sun
starting to set, the world growing dimmer and more magical with each
minute that passes. Yet, strangely, there's no awkwardness between
us. Not the sort you'd expect in such circumstances.
I feel natural with him, comfortable and confident
beyond all expectations.
Soon we reach a bench, and he sits me down.
“ Now, Ashley, are you going to keep performing?”
His eyes seem conflicted. I'm not quite sure what he
wants me to say.
“ Yes, as long as Randall wants me to.”
I give him my honest answer, seeing no reason to stop.
“ And, tell me, why are you doing this. I understand
you've never done anything like this before. That you had some
trouble at work and agreed to this fairly easily.”
“ I guess so,” I say, feeling incredibly slutty. He's
right, I did agree to fuck in public very easily. I suppose that says
a lot about me. “How do you know about the work thing though?”
“ Randall is generous with the information if we
request it. Some of the men don't like to know anything about the
girl's past. Personally, I do. I like to know who I'm watching, why
they're there doing what they're doing. You struck a particular chord
with me.”
“ Well, yeah, I suppose I needed the money...I have a
silly dream.”
“ What dream?” he asks quickly, without any feigned
interest.
“ I was working in fashion before, on the media side.
But I've always wanted to design, to have my own studio, my own
label. All of this is going to help make that happen.”
Once more I see the conflict in his eyes. Something
tells me he'd rather I didn't perform again, that he's got a
possessive quality that, now he's had me, makes him not want anyone
else to as well.
But his words don't match the look on his face.
“ Then you need to keep performing,” he says. “We
should all do whatever it takes to reach our dreams. One day, I'll
hope to see your name on a clothing label.”
“ Thanks, Gray.”
“ Don't mention it. Now, I have business I need to
attend to. If you'll excuse me.”
He stands, takes my hand, and kisses it tenderly again.
Before disappearing into the haze of the setting sun.
Chapter Four
I spend much of the next few weeks on my back.
With a dick inside me.
Or a bunch of fingers and a tongue.
According to Randall, the clients are thoroughly
enjoying me, and I've become the latest favorite among the girls in
the show room. And with that tag comes more opportunity to make
money, with both my base rate and tips starting to climb.
It also, however, comes with some pressures.
It doesn't take long before everything starts to take
its toll. I work several nights per week, turning up as always,
getting prepared, stepping out to see a new guy, face half covered in
a mask, waiting to pleasure me for the satisfaction of the elite
crowd beyond the walls.
I get through several men, and repeat my original
performance with Brett on one occasion. However, as good as he and
the others are, it's never enough for me, not anymore. Not after
having Gray, seeing his face, even bonding with him a little bit in
the park.
Somehow, the entire thing begins to feel empty and
hollow, and I start to perform on autopilot, my genuine pleasure
fading and my need for faking my orgasms growing.
They're all good fucks, of course, but there's something
missing, and every time I walk through that door I begin to hope that
it's going to be Gray waiting on the other side.
But it never is. I can tell immediately, from the shape
of their bodies, the nuances of their anatomy, the size and taste of
their dick, that it's not the man I've started to yearn for. That
it's just another guy, getting paid for this, nothing but a high
price porn star like me.
Because, really, that's all I've become.
About two weeks after my experience with Gray, however,
I manage to find a new apartment. My parents – well, my mother, in
particular – seem sad to see me go. My father, still wrapped up in
his latest case, probably won't even notice.
“