Secret Santa (novella) by Rhian Cahill Read Free Book Online

‘I’m sorry.’
    He stared at her for so long Jenn began to squirm in her seat. When he finally looked away she couldn’t decide if she was relieved or disappointed that he hadn’t argued further. Her conflicted emotions only cemented her belief that she’d made the right decision. She couldn’t open herself up to that level of insecurity. Not when she stood to lose everything that had kept her grounded in the last year.
    No. They couldn’t go any further than they already had. It was safer to remain as they were. Work colleagues and nothing more.
    Morgan clenched his jaw, grinding his back teeth together. He could see the fear in Jenn’s eyes, knew she wouldn’t cross the line without a guarantee that everything would work out. And he couldn’t give her one. No matter how much he wanted to assure her, he couldn’t know how things would turn out because he didn’t know how she felt. His feelings were one hundred percent real and solid, but proving that would take time and she wasn’t giving him — them — any.
    He signalled the waitress. They needed a distraction. They’d order lunch and then head down to the lookout. Perhaps take a walk down one of the trails. Anything to take her mind off taking the next step with him. A smile curved his lips and he turned to the waitress as she approached. ‘We’re ready to order.’
    ‘We are?’ Jenn asked.
    ‘Yes. We’re going to both have the house special.’
    ‘I don’t even know what that is.’
    ‘Trust me. You’ll love it.’
    She eyed him for a moment before nodding. ‘I’ll have an orange juice too please.’
    It amazed him that she would put her trust in him for something like ordering lunch or riding behind him on the bike and yet wouldn’t trust he’d take care of her heart. He’d take more care with that than he would anything else. He leaned back and crossed his arms.
    ‘What?’
    ‘You really don’t see it?’
    ‘See what?’ She glanced around them.
    ‘Never mind. Let’s enjoy our lunch then take a walk to the lookout.’ He didn’t fight her when Jenn changed the subject.

December 27 th
The Kiss Goodnight
    Morgan turned the bike into the driveway of Jenn’s apartment. The streets were deserted. At one in the morning he didn’t expect to see anyone out and about. Not the day after Christmas. Well the day after the day after Christmas. They’d gotten carried away with their hike in the mountains and left it far too late to head back to the bike. By the time they’d walked the last few metres of the trail he was using his phone to light their way.
    He pulled up close to the front doors and cut the engine. All was quiet as he took off his helmet and hung it on the handlebar, but he’d walk her to her door regardless. Trud would slap him upside the head if he didn’t escort his date to the door. Jenn stumbled as she slid of the back of the bike and he whipped around and grabbed her waist to steady her.
    ‘Whoa. Tired?’he asked.
    Her helmet bobbed as she nodded and she mumbled something he couldn’t quiet catch.
    ‘What?’
    She fiddled with the chin strap. It took her a few seconds to get it free, but Morgan was worried her legs wouldn’t hold her yet so didn’t help. ‘Ah, that’s better,’ she said as she pulled her helmet off.
    There were dark smudges under her eyes. ‘You look exhausted. Let’s get you upstairs.’ He swung his leg over the front of the bike and stood beside her.
    ‘Oh, no, that’s okay. I can get there from here.’
    ‘Are you trying to get me into trouble with Trud?’ he asked. Morgan hoped the small dose of guilt would silence her protests.
    ‘Oh.’ She chewed the corner of her bottom lip and the urge to do that for her sliced through him. ‘It’s only one flight up.’
    ‘Doesn’t matter. A gentleman always walks a lady to her door.’
    Jenn rolled her eyes at him. ‘Fine. Walk me to my door.’
    She said it as though it were a chore to have him by her side. He’d have to change her