See Jane Die by Erica Spindler Read Free Book Online Page B

and Ian had agreed to keep their news to themselves, and when they did spill it, Stacy would be the first.
    But Dave couldn’t help her if she wasn’t honest with him.
    â€œI’m pregnant.”
    His expression went momentarily slack with surprise, then lit up with pleasure. He jumped to his feet, came around the table and drew her up into a bear hug. “I’m so happy for you! This is wonderful news!”
    She held him tightly, suddenly irrationally terrified.
    He let her hold him a moment, then drew away. “What are you scared of, Jane?”
    She thought of her session with Anne, how she had posed nearly that same question to her subject: “Tell me what you’re afraid of. When you’re alone with your thoughts, who’s the monster?”
    The other woman had answered honestly. Could she?
    â€œLet’s sit down,” she said. He nodded and a moment later they once again faced each other across the table. “You start?” she said.
    â€œAll right.” He folded his hands in front of him. “How’s everything?”
    â€œGreat.”
    â€œIs it?”
    â€œYes…God, yes. I’m the luckiest person alive.”
    â€œYou really believe that?”
    â€œI do. I’ve been thinking a lot about luck lately.” She paused, taking a moment to collect her thoughts. “Not just because of Ian or the baby or the show. The day of the accident, if that doctor hadn’t been home, if he hadn’t heard the screams and called 911 before he came running, if the ambulance had been held up or the EMS guys hadn’t been experienced, or the boat had crossed a fraction of an inch in another direction…I would have died.”
    She clasped her hands in her lap; they trembled. “Andnow I have everything. Love. Success in a career I adore. A baby on the way.”
    â€œSo why the nightmares?”
    â€œYou’re the headshrinker. You tell me.”
    â€œOkay.” He leaned forward slightly. “Maybe you’re afraid your luck’s going to run out? That you’re going to lose it all?”
    â€œBut why would I—”
    â€œWhat happens when all someone’s dreams come true?”
    â€œThey’re happy?”
    He ignored her sarcasm. “Once upon a time, you took your life for granted. You had everything, a happy family, friends, popularity. And in an instant, someone took it away from you.
    â€œYou know how fast that can happen, Jane. You know how fickle fate is, how precious each moment is.
    â€œAll your dreams have come true.” He caught her hands. Squeezed them tightly. “And you’re afraid of losing it all again. That your luck is going to run out.”
    She pressed her trembling lips together, his words, their meaning, resounding in her.
    â€œThat’s what your dream represents, Jane. Losing it all. Living with that despair. You survived the first time, you made it. So he’s going to try again, in your words, to finish the job.”
    Dear God, he was right. It mattered so much now. She had everything .
    It all made sense .
    A small sound of relief slipped past her lips. “You’re right, Dave. Thank God. I…I was afraid I was losing it. That I was somehow slipping back into that dark place. I never want to go back there. Never .”
    He squeezed her hands, then released them. “You want to conquer your fears? See them for what they are.”
    â€œSilly. Overwrought. Groundless.”
    â€œNone of the above,” he scolded, tone gentle. “You lived through a severe trauma. The mind adapts, protects itself. The most extreme example of that is MPD, multiple-personality disorder.”
    She smiled. “I feel as if a giant weight has just been lifted off my shoulders.”
    â€œDave Nash, super genius.”
    â€œOr as Stacy and I used to say, stupor genius.”
    â€œSpeaking of your sister, how did Stacy respond to your news?”
    â€œShe