Selby Surfs

Selby Surfs by Duncan Ball Read Free Book Online

Book: Selby Surfs by Duncan Ball Read Free Book Online
Authors: Duncan Ball
‘It
could
and I think it will.’
    ‘Do you really?’
    ‘Frankly, yes, I do.’
    ‘Poor Camilla,’ Mrs Trifle said to Dr Trifle after the librarian had gone. ‘I think she lives in a fantasy world.’
    ‘What do you mean?’
    ‘She really thinks that Dino diSwarve, a world famous, super-rich, and quite-good-looking-if-you-ask-me movie star is going to fall in love with her.’
    ‘It could happen,’ Dr Trifle said, looking up from his newspaper.
    ‘How could it?’
    ‘Well if he got to know her he’d realise that she’s a very interesting person. Then he might fall in love and even marry her.’
    ‘Oh, heavens. Movie stars don’t fall in love with teacher-librarians. Everyone knows that. Everyone except Camilla. I do worry about her.’
    ‘Mrs Trifle’s right,’ Selby thought. ‘Camilla’s just going to make herself unhappy by hoping that Dino will fall in love with her. I wish she’d be more realistic. Oh, well, there’s nothing I can do. Anyway, I wonder if I can sneak into the library and watch the filming tomorrow. That sounds like good fun.’
    The next day was Saturday and there were no schoolchildren at Camilla’s library when Selby arrived but the street outside was in totalchaos. There were trucks and more trucks filled with movie cameras, lights, props and other equipment. And there were people running in every direction, talking to each other through their headsets. Sneaking into the library was the easiest thing that Selby had ever done.
    ‘An elephant could walk in here and nobody would notice,’ Selby thought as he looked around at the people inside. ‘Look! There’s Gary Gaggs! And there’s Camilla! Oh, no! She bought a really expensive-looking floral dress just to meet Dino in. Poor Camilla.’
    In the bright lights in front of the camera, the director talked to the actor.
    ‘That’s him!’ Selby squealed in his brain. ‘It’s the real Dino diSwarve! I can’t believe I’m actually looking at him. He certainly is a lot shorter than he is in his films.’
    ‘Okay,’ called the director. ‘Quiet on the set everyone! Roll ‘em! Let’s see if we can get it right this time. Come in, Bonnie.’
    Selby watched as the actress who was playing the librarian came out of the office and walked up to Dino.
    ‘Bonnie Blake?’ Selby thought. ‘It’s her! It’s Bonnie Blake! I absolutely adore Bonnie Blake! Well, I adore her but I don’t think I’d want to marry her,’ he added.
    ‘Hello, Ron,’ Bonnie said, smiling at Dino and batting her eyelashes. ‘How are you today?’
    Dino looked at her and gave a broad smile.
    ‘Hi, Janey, baby,’ he said. ‘I’m great. How about you?’
    ‘Cut!’ the director yelled. ‘No, no, Dino. You’re not supposed to look at her. Look down at the ground. And you’re supposed to mumble, “I’m — I’m sorry is the library closing or something".’
    ‘But that’s stupid,’ Dino said.
    ‘That’s what the script says.’
    ‘So what? Who cares about the stupid script?’
    ‘Your character is very shy,’ the director said. ‘He wouldn’t say, “Hi, Janey, baby".’
    ‘Well I’m not going to play him shy. I always play a jokey kind of tough guy. That’s the real me. I want to be me.’
    ‘But that’s not what this movie is about,’ the director said. ‘He’s got to be shy or the story doesn’t work. I hired you to play a shy guy.’
    ‘Who’s kidding who? You hired me because I’ve got a million fans out there and they love to go to movies if I’m in them. They don’t want to see me playing a wimp.’
    Bonnie Blake glared at him.
    ‘You can’t do it, can you?’ she said.
    ‘What do you mean?’
    ‘You can only play yourself because you don’t know how to act.’
    ‘Whoa! Of course I can act.’
    ‘No, you can’t.’
    ‘Can!’
    ‘Can’t!’
    ‘What would you know about acting?’ Dino said. ‘You’re nothing but a soapie star. I’m a big time movie star.’
    ‘At least I went to acting school. They

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