Shopping for an Heir by Julia Kent Read Free Book Online

slightly. “Googling a date is so commonplace now, I assumed you’d done it. Don’t pretend you didn’t. You know who I am. I’m an investment banker.” He named the top firm in the city. “And I know what you do, obviously. You’ve done well at Phelps, Miller. Then again, plenty of lawyers can do well in small ponds like that firm.”
    It hit her.
    She suddenly knew exactly what he was doing. He glanced at his phone again and she realized:
    He’d been negging her.
    “Excuse me,” she said, standing. Steve was clearly well mannered, for he stood respectfully as she walked away to the ladies’ room, struggling to keep her shoulders relaxed, her purse clutched in her fist. As she turned the corner she saw his head bent over the blue glow of his phone screen.
    Great.
    Her hands flushed hot and cold as she reached into her purse, resting on the settee as she texted her best friend, Kari.
    RESCUE TEXT NEEDED! she typed.
    Ten seconds later, her best friend replied.
    Damn! Sorry. Will text. That bad?
    Hard to explain, but it’s bad.
    Need me to come in person and pretend to be your lover?
    Kari had done that once. It blew up in their faces when the date asked for a threesome.
    Never mind , Kari wrote, as if reading her mind. Didn’t go so well last time.
    I draw the line at tongue kissing you, Suzanne tapped, laughing to herself. Bad enough we shared a sleeping bag that one time when we camped in Montana.
    I’m only a lesbian when it’s negative two degrees outside , Kari joked. What’s he doing?
    Negging me! Only it’s like he’s following a script , she replied.
    Her phone rang.
    “Suz, is he following a script? Remember that dating service I mystery shopped, where we were trained on anti-PUA techniques?”
    Kari pronounced the word like POO-uh .
    “Poo-uh?”
    “Pick-up artist.”
    “Oh, God. Is that what he’s doing? Why? Why do guys do this shit?”
    “Did he start out with something like, ‘I just have to tell you—’ and then flatter you?”
    Suzanne’s stomach went cold. “Yes.”
    “And did he show you pictures of himself surrounded by hot women and elite men?”
    “Oh my God, Kari, yes!” Her voice went high and screechy. “How did you know?”
    “And now he’s negging you.”
    “Yes!”
    “He’s following the Eight Tips.”
    “What are ‘the Eight Tips’?”
    “These PUA trainers have workshops and books where they train guys on how to get women to sleep with them. There’s a famous list of eight tips for bagging a woman.”
    “ Bagging? I’m about as likely to sleep with Steve Raleigh as I am to shove a breadstick up my ass.”
    “Thanks for the visual. You know I’m eating dinner right now.” Kari paused. “Steve Raleigh, huh? I’ll Google him for you when we’re off the phone.”
    “Sorry. What do I do?” she asked. Kari was more worldly when it came to dating. “I just want to tell him off and disappear.”
    “You could,” Kari mused. “But what about having some fun with him?”
    “Fun? You call this fun?”
    “What if you turn it around on him? Make him suffer a little.”
    “Now you’re talking my language. How?”
    “If he’s really following a script, then his next step is kee-no.”
    “KEE-no? Like the game?”
    “No. K-I-N-O. It’s this stupid phrase that’s short for kinesthetics. He’s going to start covertly touching you in non-sexual places as a test to see where your physical boundaries are.”
    “You mean he’ll groom me.”
    “Basically.”
    “This is so gross.”
    “Welcome to the world of the pick-up artist. You’re an object. An animal who can be trained.”
    “So turn the training right back around on him?”
    “Exactly. He won’t know what hit him.”
    “So what do I do?”
    “KINO is all about quietly touching you. They start with the shoulder. The knee. The arm. Then they move on to brush the side-boob, the hip, and so forth. They’re testing your bounds.”
    “So I give it back?”
    “But on your terms, Suz.” Kari