Silence Once Begun by Jesse Ball Read Free Book Online

That’s a good thing to have, and a good reason to have it.
    MRS. ODA
    Oh no, I don’t think of it that way. I rescued it from him. I don’t think he cared about the spoon at all.

Interview 9 (
Father
)
    [
Int. note
. I had attempted to speak with the father on many occasions. He would agree over the telephone to meet, and then the day would come and he would simply not arrive. His wife gave many excuses: his declining health; the difficulty of travel; the day was hot, etc. When we spoke again on the telephone he would act confused. He had not known we were to meet, etc. After perhaps nine or ten such assignations, he finally arrived. He was extremely thin and small, hardly the dominating force that he had seemed to be from his family’s accounts of him. However, when he spoke, there was a certain forcefulness there. Like his son, he appeared to distrust and dislike me. He felt that I was attempting to trick Mrs. Oda into telling me things that I shouldn’t hear. He had come to set things straight. I was not to listen to the things that Mrs. Oda said. He wanted to make that clear. He was going to tell me some things, and that would be that. The things he would tell me would take the place of what Mrs. Oda had said, and certainly should take the place of whatever nonsense his son was feeding me. He was surprised to hear that Minako had spoken to me. He did not know she was in the country, and seemed confused by the news. It took a little while to get him back on track. He preferred to speak in the yard, so occasionally on the tape there is the sound of traffic in the distance. He said that when one was his age, any day with a fine afternoon sun like that had to be used. One had to use things when one had them, so he said.]

    INT .
    Where shall we begin?
    MR. ODA
    I was not surprised when I heard the news, when Iwas told by our neighbor that someone had seen my son taken away to the police station. I can tell you that, Mr. Ball. I was not surprised at all. If these things took others by surprise, well, they did not take me by surprise.
    INT .
    Why were you not surprised? How could you possibly have guessed that such a thing would happen?
    MR. ODA
    I have always known that something terrible was going to come. Until then our life had gone well. I was living in the shadow of this thing, this terrible thing that no one else could see. But, I knew that it was coming. Fishermen are not like other people. We can tell things; not like priests. I am not saying we are special or deserve any regard. We deserve no regard. In fact, one might say we are the lowest ones, drudging around in the water for a lifestyle that keeps one’s family poor, that never amounts to anything. But we do see things. Sometimes we see them before they happen. It is not reliable. It isn’t the same as knowing about things. One doesn’t find it useful, you see? Do you, do you see? It isn’t a useful thing. It is just a thing. I knew something grave was coming, and when it came, I recognized it. I had seen it before, you see. It was like an old friend. Or an old enemy. One saw, though, immediately, that there were no preparations that could have been made. That sort of thing is just foolishness.
    INT .
    So, you thought Sotatsu was doomed? That he never would have amounted to anything?
    MR. ODA
    He and my brother got along very well. My brother’sbusiness was nearly ruined by that, by Sotatsu’s presence. But they got on well.
    INT .
    Why did you not visit your son in the jail?
    MR. ODA
    What do you mean? I went there. I went there first, before anyone.
    INT .
    I’m sorry, I know that, I meant to say, why did you not visit him after that first visit? Why did you stop going?
    MR. ODA
    This is not the reason I came here to talk to you.
    INT .
    Do you have something else you want to talk about?
    MR. ODA
    I do. I do.
    INT .
    Well, tell me what you want to tell me. I am ready to hear anything you have to say.
    MR. ODA
    Mr. Ball, my son was ill. He was ill