the Taylorsâ porch.
Alisonâs eyes had never left him. âI donât defend them about that ââ
âDefend them? Have you ever thought about telling them that Iâm not the local equivalent of a car thief?â
âThey know youâre not, and itâs not all about being Catholic. My parents are afraid weâll just keep right on going together. They think itâs too young and too soon.â She paused, voice quieter yet. âTheyâre asking that we see each other one night a weekend and leave the other free.â
Tony felt a stab of jealousy and, beneath that, a hurt that went much deeper. âAnd go out with other people, you mean? Just to keep your parents happy? I canât believe thatâs what you want.â
For the first time, Alison looked down. âI said part was my parents. Not all.â She drew a breath, sliding down into the water. âIâm afraid , all right? Iâm afraid of how it will be for me and how Iâll feel later. That somehow it will change things.â She looked up at him again, tears in her eyes. âSometimes I want you so much I can hardly stand it. But itâs like putting you in charge of me, giving you a part of me. Donât you understand how confusing that feels?â
Tony shook his head. â My feelings arenât confused at all.â
Now Alisonâs eyes took him in. Softly, she answered, âThatâs the last part, Tony. You werenât confused with Mary Jane, either. But how do you feel now?â
This time it was Tony who looked away. âWhat if it happened tonight?â she asked. âLike most of me wanted it to. Will you feel as good as you always tell me you would? Or will you end up feeling awful about what weâve done, and have to confess me like Iâm some kind of sin? Do you ever wonder how that would make me feel?â
She had never said this with such emotion. All at once, Tony lost the heart to argue.
Seeing this, Alison gently kissed his face. For an instant, their bodies touched; for this brief moment, Tony felt the electricity of renewed desire, the more painful because they might never satisfy it.
Slowly, Alison backed away. âTheyâll be coming back soon. We should get out.â
Tony exhaled. âI guess so.â
They walked to the shore together, Alison a little ahead of him. When she stepped from the water, she looked so beautiful that it hurt. Miserably, Tony said, âI can take you home.â
She turned to him, a silver silhouette. âIâll stay for a while, Tony. I donât want you having to explain yourself to Sam.â
They dressed in the dark and sat together, silent and unhappy, waiting for Sue and Sam to finish making love. It took them months to repair the damage; that night, Tony could not imagine that they would ever become lovers.
Chapter 4
Tony started the car. âI hated that night,â he said to Alison.
Turning, she touched his face. âSo did I.â
In his headlights, Tony could see Sam in his own car, tipping a flask to his lips and then wheeling away.
Through the window, Alison watched the taillights of Samâs car recede in the darkness, her profile reflective. After a moment, she said, âI donât think Iâd want to be Sue tonight.â
Tony glanced at her. âHeâll be all right. Most times, Samâs got a pretty good idea of where to draw the line.â
âBut not always.â She turned to him. âSometimes I wonder how you guys got to be so close.â
Tony began driving toward Taylor Park. âWe were just both there, the two best guys on almost every team we played for. We could have been friends, or we could have been rivals I guess we both knew friends was better.â
She gave him a curious look. âSometimes I watch you two, and itâs like Samâs your bad twin brother. The one who gets away with doing all the things the good