Souls of the Never: A Fantasy Scifi Romance Time Travel series, with Dragons, Elves and Faeries. (Tales of the Neverwar Series Book 1) by CJ Rutherford, Colin Rutherford Read Free Book Online Page B
Authors: CJ Rutherford, Colin Rutherford
her friend repeated.
“Shh Kat, it’s OK honey,” Perri whispered, not wishing to cause her friend more pain.
“It’s not OK!!” shouted Katheryne as she sat up, tears flowing down her cheeks.
Perri was taken aback by the anger on Kat’s face, afraid for a split second after what had just happened, before realising her friend’s anger was directed inwards, at herself.
Perri sat, confused, as Katheryne got up and walked to the kitchen. She heard her fix two glasses with ice and bourbon, before returning to sit down on the couch. She handed a glass to Perri before taking a long sip on hers.
“I owe you an explanation,” she said.
Perri was about to go off on a “Feckin’ right you do” retort, but caught herself. There would be a time and a place for this later, but for now her friend was hurting and she wanted to help. She stayed silent.
Katheryne’s eyes were wet. “When my mum died the way she did...it destroyed me, Perri.” Katheryne let go, the tears flowing freely down her face. “I thought at the time that I had no one. My mother and father were my best friends. I know I was sent away to school, but that didn’t bother me. I know why it had to be like that, and we talked every single day, about absolutely everything.”
Perri wanted so much to gather her friend up in her arms right now, but she knew Katheryne needed to unload all this baggage she had been suppressing for years. So she sat back and listened as her friend continued.
“But then mum was gone, and every time I looked at dad all I could see was him looking back at me, seeing my mother and recoiling with guilt.
“It wasn’t in my head, Perri!” she insisted, as her friend started to shake her head to try and persuade her she was wrong. “I knew it was true; I could feel his hurt.” Katheryne was shaking again.
“I could feel it, but I couldn’t do anything but add to it, so I helped my dad to do what he thought he wanted. I helped to push him away.” Katheryne sat still, and Perri reeled from her admission. They’d never talked about the reasons her father never called her, but Perri always assumed it had been his decision to distance himself.
“He called me, a month after the funeral, twice. He left a voicemail. He wanted to talk. But I didn’t call him back.” Katheryne’s voice broke. She looked over at Perri, pleading with her to understand, without realising her friend had already decided how she felt, and that she loved her and respected her even more than before.
“You thought if he didn’t see you, he’d be able to heal, to get over it faster, didn’t you?” asked Perri. As her friend broke down again, she went to her and gently stroked her hair as she pulled her into her arms. Katheryne nodded, still sobbing.
“Kat, it wasn’t your job to be strong for your father. You were what, seventeen when it happened? It was his job to be strong for you!”
Perri was furious. “And a month….he waited a month, after his wife….your mother... died, to call his only child. And all he did was leave two feckin messages?”
Katheryne raised her head, just enough so Perri saw the anguish and self loathing in her eyes.
“But Perri, that’s not the worst, not by a long shot,” she cried, turning away, as if she didn’t want Perri to see the guilt in her eyes and condemn her as she told the final truth.
“Part of me never survived what happened,” Katheryne explained, looking back, willing herself to meet her friends gaze. Perri looked back in confusion.
“I never let anyone into my heart from that point on. No one was able to come close, so no one would be able to hurt me like that again. And I wouldn’t be able to hurt anyone again either.
“Aye, I let a few people get part way, like your parents...and you, but never all the way in.” She looked at Perri in resignation.
Perri simply stared back for what seemed like an eternity. Katheryne was about to ask her to say something when Perri broke the
“Shh Kat, it’s OK honey,” Perri whispered, not wishing to cause her friend more pain.
“It’s not OK!!” shouted Katheryne as she sat up, tears flowing down her cheeks.
Perri was taken aback by the anger on Kat’s face, afraid for a split second after what had just happened, before realising her friend’s anger was directed inwards, at herself.
Perri sat, confused, as Katheryne got up and walked to the kitchen. She heard her fix two glasses with ice and bourbon, before returning to sit down on the couch. She handed a glass to Perri before taking a long sip on hers.
“I owe you an explanation,” she said.
Perri was about to go off on a “Feckin’ right you do” retort, but caught herself. There would be a time and a place for this later, but for now her friend was hurting and she wanted to help. She stayed silent.
Katheryne’s eyes were wet. “When my mum died the way she did...it destroyed me, Perri.” Katheryne let go, the tears flowing freely down her face. “I thought at the time that I had no one. My mother and father were my best friends. I know I was sent away to school, but that didn’t bother me. I know why it had to be like that, and we talked every single day, about absolutely everything.”
Perri wanted so much to gather her friend up in her arms right now, but she knew Katheryne needed to unload all this baggage she had been suppressing for years. So she sat back and listened as her friend continued.
“But then mum was gone, and every time I looked at dad all I could see was him looking back at me, seeing my mother and recoiling with guilt.
“It wasn’t in my head, Perri!” she insisted, as her friend started to shake her head to try and persuade her she was wrong. “I knew it was true; I could feel his hurt.” Katheryne was shaking again.
“I could feel it, but I couldn’t do anything but add to it, so I helped my dad to do what he thought he wanted. I helped to push him away.” Katheryne sat still, and Perri reeled from her admission. They’d never talked about the reasons her father never called her, but Perri always assumed it had been his decision to distance himself.
“He called me, a month after the funeral, twice. He left a voicemail. He wanted to talk. But I didn’t call him back.” Katheryne’s voice broke. She looked over at Perri, pleading with her to understand, without realising her friend had already decided how she felt, and that she loved her and respected her even more than before.
“You thought if he didn’t see you, he’d be able to heal, to get over it faster, didn’t you?” asked Perri. As her friend broke down again, she went to her and gently stroked her hair as she pulled her into her arms. Katheryne nodded, still sobbing.
“Kat, it wasn’t your job to be strong for your father. You were what, seventeen when it happened? It was his job to be strong for you!”
Perri was furious. “And a month….he waited a month, after his wife….your mother... died, to call his only child. And all he did was leave two feckin messages?”
Katheryne raised her head, just enough so Perri saw the anguish and self loathing in her eyes.
“But Perri, that’s not the worst, not by a long shot,” she cried, turning away, as if she didn’t want Perri to see the guilt in her eyes and condemn her as she told the final truth.
“Part of me never survived what happened,” Katheryne explained, looking back, willing herself to meet her friends gaze. Perri looked back in confusion.
“I never let anyone into my heart from that point on. No one was able to come close, so no one would be able to hurt me like that again. And I wouldn’t be able to hurt anyone again either.
“Aye, I let a few people get part way, like your parents...and you, but never all the way in.” She looked at Perri in resignation.
Perri simply stared back for what seemed like an eternity. Katheryne was about to ask her to say something when Perri broke the
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