Spy Hook by Len Deighton Read Free Book Online

of that and she wanted me to know.
    'I know he did. He told everyone that you would change your mind.'
    'No. I had my job!' she said, her voice rising as if to repeat the arguments they'd had about it.
    'It's a difficult decision,' I said to calm her. In the silence there was a sudden loud throbbing noise close by. She jumped almost out of her skin. Then she realized that it was the freezer cabinet in the corner and she smiled.
    'Perhaps I should have done. It would have been better I suppose.'
    'It's too late now, Cindy,' I said hurriedly before she started to go weepy on me.
    'I know; I know; I know.' She got a handkerchief from her pocket but rolled it up and gripped it tight in her red-knuckled hand as if resolving not to sob.
    'Perhaps you should see a lawyer,' I said.
    'What do they know?' she said contemptuously. 'I've seen three lawyers. They pass you on one from the other like a parcel, and by the time I was finished paying out all the fees I knew that some law books say one thing and other law books say different.'
    'The lawyers can quote from the law books until they are blue in the face,' I said. 'But eventually people have to sort out the solutions with each other. Going to lawyers is just an expensive way of putting off what you're going to have to do anyway.'
    'Is that what you really think, Bernard?'
    'More or less,' I said. 'Buying a house, making a will, getting divorced. Providing you know what you want, you don't need a lawyer for any of that.'
    'Yes,' she said. 'What's more important than getting married, and you don't go to a lawyer to do that.'
    'In foreign countries you do,' I told her. 'Couples don't get married without signing a marriage contract. They never have this sort of problem that you have. They decide it all beforehand.'
    'It sounds a bit cold-blooded.'
    'Maybe it is, but marriage can be a bit too hot-blooded too.'
    'Was yours?' She released her grip on the tiny handkerchief and spread it out on her lap to see the coloured border and the embroidered initials LP.
    'My marriage?' I said. 'Too hot-blooded?'
    'Yes.'
    'Perhaps.' I sipped my drink. It was a long time since I'd had one of these heavy bitter-tasting brews. I wiped the froth from my lips; it was good. 'I thought I knew Fiona, but I suppose I didn't know her well enough.'
    'She was so lovely. I know she loved you, Bernard.'
    'I think she did.'
    'She showed me that fantastic engagement ring and said, Bernie sold his Ferrari to buy that for me.'
    'It sounds like a line from afternoon television,' I said, 'but it was a very old battered Ferrari.'
    'She loved you, Bernard.'
    'People change, Cindy. You said that yourself.'
    'Did it affect the children much?'
    'Billy seemed to take it in his stride but Sally… She was all right until I took a girl-friend home. Lots of crying at night. But I think she's adjusted now.' I said it more because I wanted it to be true than because I believed it. I worried about the children, worried a lot, but that was none of Cindy's business.
    'Gloria Kent, the one you work with?'
    This Cindy knew everything. Well, the FO had always been Whitehall 's gossip exchange. 'That's right,' I said.
    'It's difficult for children,' said Cindy. 'I suppose I should be thankful that we didn't have any.'
    'You're right,' I said. I drank some Guinness and sneaked a look at the time.
    'But on the other hand, if we'd had kids perhaps Jim wouldn't have wanted to go so much. He wanted to prove himself, you see. Lately I've wondered if he blamed himself that we never were able to have children.'
    'Jim was talking about that time when the kitchen caught fire,' I said.
    'Jim spilled the oil. He's always been clumsy.'
    'Fiona didn't do it?'
    'She took the blame,' said Cindy with a sigh. 'Jim could never admit to making a mistake. That was his nature.'
    'Yes, Fiona took the blame,' I said. 'She told me Jim did it but she really took the blame… the insurance… everything.'
    'Fiona was a remarkable woman, Bernard, you know that.