That’s How I Roll: A Novel by Andrew Vachss Read Free Book Online Page B

one I was going to tell on TV, in court, and anyplace else where I got asked.
    Our agreement was that he’d run the story in what he called the “bulldog edition” of his newspaper. The show would air from nine to eleven at night—the bulldog would go out at midnight, in print and on the Web.
    I guaranteed Mr. Trey he’d be the only print reporter I’d ever talk to. And he guaranteed me that no editor was going to touch what he wrote. So, if the TV people played it loose with their editing, they’d look like fools. And liars.
    Mr. Trey and I shook on that. There isn’t any more that could have been done, although he offered to put everything in writing.
    “What would I do with a contract between men like us?” I told him. “For me, my word is a contract. Otherwise, I couldn’t have done a lot of things I’m going to tell you about. I’m taking your word the same as mine was taken.”
    he next day, I told the TV people I’d let them bring their cameras in. They could ask me any questions they wanted, except for what I told them in advance was off-limits. I’d made sure they put that in the contract we all signed. Taking
their
word would put them in a class where they didn’t belong.
    I already knew I wouldn’t have to answer the questions that frightened me to even think about—it would never occur to people like them to ask such questions. And the contract said they couldn’t “go beyond the scope” of my crimes. No backstory, no digging into my life. I was a little concerned they’d balk at that part, but it didn’t seem to bother them one bit.
    “It’s actually a better story this way,” one of the TV big shots said to some of the others. He was talking about me like I wasn’t in the room, but I wasn’t insulted. The more invisible I could be, the more they’d say in front of me.
    “Our audience is going to hear the story of a hired killer,” the big shot said. “A detailed account of every murder. It’s going to chill people’s blood. You want to know why? Because we’re not showing them some filthy, slobbering psycho; Esau looks like a college professor. That’s the best part. Esau killed a lot of people because he got paid to do it. There’s nothing more to the story. How scary is
that
?
    “Serial killers, by now they’re … they’re almost boring. But what we’ve got is something truly unique—a pure predator. Not someone who kills because he’s sick; someone who kills to feed his family. Every crime he talks about, the facts are right there foranyone to check. And the bodies are always going to be right where he says they are.
    “See the beauty of it? If the competition wants to speculate on how Esau came to be what he is, that’s fine with us. In fact, it’s
better
than fine. Every time they interview some expert, every time they ‘investigate’ Esau’s real motivation, they’re promoting
our
product. I’ll bet we sell more DVDs of this show than of all the rest we ever did, combined. It’s going to be in criminology classes. Libraries. Cited in textbooks.
    “You can’t buy that kind of credibility. It’s not only going to enhance our network image, win us all kinds of awards—it could turn out to have the longest legs ever.”
    You could see it on their faces. Even smell it coming off them like a thick, rolling fog of musk. To the other people in that room, what that big shot was saying was more important than oxygen.
    With that in hand, I went on to Step Ten.
    f everybody keeps up their end of the deal, I’ll die alone. Alone and silent, the way I’m supposed to.
    To the newspapers, I’ll be the worst murderer in the whole history of this state.
    I guess they should say that. I will have saved Tory-boy by telling the truth. A kind of truth, anyway. The kind of truth the Law feeds on. Once I learned how deep the Feds had their people planted in so many places, I had only one choice if I wanted to keep Tory-boy safe past my time.
    The way I explained it