The Bed and Breakfast Star by Jacqueline Wilson Read Free Book Online Page A

ciggies and papers and videos – all the things you need.
    Some of the boys from the hotel were mucking around at the video stands, whizzing them round too fast and acting out bits from the films. One of them lunged at me with his hands all pointy, pretending to be Freddie from Elm Street.

    ‘Ooooh, I’m so fwightened,’ I said, sighing heavily. ‘What are you lot doing here, anyway? Are you bunking off from school?’
    They shuffled a bit so I was obviously right.
    ‘Don’t you tell on us or you’ll get it, see,’ said another, trying to act dead tough.
    ‘Don’t worry. I don’t tell tales,’ I said, looking witheringly at the funny-face boy who had told on me.
    He shuffled a bit more, his face going red.
    ‘Yeah, well, I didn’t think your dad would get mad at you like that,’ he said quickly.
    ‘He’s not my dad. He’s just my mum’s bloke, that’s all.’
    ‘Did he hit you? We heard you yelling.’
    ‘You’d yell if he was laying into you.’
    ‘Here. Have this,’ said the funny-face boy, and he handed me his big black magic-marker pen, the one I’d used to correct his spelling to write the truly worst word ever.
    ‘Hey, are you giving this to me?’ I said.
    ‘Yeah, if you want.’
    ‘You bet I want! My own black felt-tip’s run out. Hey, what goes black and white, black and white, black and white?’
    ‘Hmm?’ he said, looking blank.
    But one of his mates spoilt it.
    ‘A nun rolling down a hill,’ he said, grinning. ‘That’s an old joke.’
    ‘OK, OK, what’s black and white and goes ha-ha?’
    I paused. This time I’d got them.
    ‘The nun that pushed her!’
    Funny-face suddenly snorted with laughter. The others all sniggered too. Laughing at my joke! I’d have happily stood there cracking jokes all day but the man behind the counter started to get narked so the boys sloped off while Pippa and I chose our sweets. It took a long time, especially as Pippa kept chopping and changing. Once or twice she changed her mind after she’d had a little experimental lick of a liquorice bootlace or a red jelly spider, but the man behind the counter couldn’t see down far enough to spot her.
    We ended up with:

    We ate them on the way back to the hotel. We weren’t in any hurry to get back. Mack had been so grouchy recently he’d even got mad at Pippa.
    I meant to save a chocolate bar for Naomi, and a toffee chew or two for her brothers, but I seemed to get ever so hungry somehow, and by the time Naomi got back from school there were just a few dolly mixtures left (and they were a bit dusty and sticky because Pippa had been ‘feeding’ them to Baby Pillow half the afternoon).
    ‘Never mind, I’ll give them a little wash under the tap,’ said Naomi, going into the Ladies.
    We ended up with:
    She and I scrunched up together on the windowsill, feet propped on the basin, and we read the worst bits of her Cursed Werewolf book and got the giggles. My Pippa and her Nicky and Neil and Nathan kept on plaguing us so we filled the other basins with water and hauled them up so they could have a little paddle. They were only meant to dangle their feet. They dangled quite a bit more.

    I was scared I’d get into trouble with Mum and Mack for getting Pippa soaked, but luckily Mum didn’t notice and Mack had gone out for a takeaway and taken Hank with him. Hank loves to go anywhere with Mack. He’s a really weird baby. He thinks his dad is great.
    I think Mack is great too. A great big hairy warthog.

    Pippa and Nicky and Neil and Nathan weren’t the only ones who got soaked when they went paddling in the basins. The floor in the Ladies turned into a sort of sea too. Naomi and I tried to mop it up a bit but we only had loo paper to do it with so we weren’t very successful.
    Mrs Hoover had to mop it up properly and she wasn’t very pleased. I felt bad about it so the next day Pippa and I helped her with her hoovering. I’d got lumbered with Hank as well, but I tried hard to get him to flick