The Chameleon Wore Chartreuse by Bruce Hale Read Free Book Online Page A

Billy turn a lovely shade of red.

    She dragged him over to me as Natalie landed beside us on the grass.
    "Some detective you are!" said Shirley. "You didn't find him until the very last minute." She looked me up and down, then smiled. "But I guess you tried your best."
    She kissed me on the cheek.
    "Gross!" said her brother.
    What was I, some kind of cootie magnet? I'll never understand dames.
    "You look pretty funny." Shirley chuckled. "With no tail and that big belly, you look just like a bullfrog."
    "Ha-ha," I tried to say. But I was so stuffed, all that came out was a loud "
Buuurp!
"
    "You sound like a frog, too," said Shirley.

    "Hey, that's my partner you're talking about," said Natalie.
    I gave them both my best tough-guy look. But my belly was so heavy, I didn't dare open my mouth again.
    "So, Billy, how did Herman make you go along with his prank?" said Natalie. "What cruel blackmail did he use?"
    "Blackmail?!" said Billy. "I would have
paid
him to let me help. I hate that stupid gopher mascot. Our mascot should be a lizard."
    Natalie and I looked at each other. He had a point there.
    "
Buurp
—but what about that drawing I saw in your desk?" I said.
    "You were looking at my comic strip?" said Billy. He ducked his head.
    "And why did you get mad when Herman was joking about your sister yesterday?" said Natalie.
    Billy's eyes spun in their sockets. "He told me he caught Shirley writing
Shirley + Chet = love 4 ever
on a wall. That makes me sick. It's totally gross!"
    I had to agree with him.
    No wonder Shirley didn't tell me she was a cheerleader. She didn't want me to know that she knew Herman, and that he knew her mushy secret.
    "Did you know Herman was planning his revenge?" Natalie asked.

    Shirley turned a delicate shade of scarlet and cleared her throat. "Kind of," she said in a small voice. "But he said he wouldn't tell my secret if I wouldn't tell his."
    Shirley studied some clouds above us like they were going to be on the next science test. Natalie smirked and wiggled her eyebrows. I shook my head in disgust.
    Shirley cleared her throat again. "Look, fair's fair. You found Billy, so I'll keep my part of the bargain. Tomorrow morning, expect a great big piece of stinkbug pie."
    Stinkbug pie?! Right then, I was too full even to think about it. But, as every detective knows, tomorrow is another case.

----
Would
you
rescue
your
principal? Chet would. Find out why in
The Mystery of Mr. Nice
    I looked around the waiting room. Strange. Where a line of smart alecks usually sat waiting for justice, empty chairs greeted me.

    Principal Zero must be putting his punishment on speed dial,
I thought.
    I stepped inside. Behind a wide black desk sat Principal Zero, the source of all discipline at Emerson Hicky Elementary. I knew I was about to get mine.
    "Yes?" he said.
    I laid my pink slip and the torn drawing side by side on his desk. He looked from one to the other.
    "Nice artwork, Mr.... Gecko," he said. "It has a wonderful sense of color, and the style is quite mature."
    I blinked. He was serious.
    "Lovely use of dark and light," said Principal Zero. He picked up the pink slip. "Now, what seems to be the problem?"
    "Well, Mr. Ratnose didn't ... urn ... like my drawing."
    "I can't believe it," he said. "Perhaps his taste in art is not so refined. I'd love to have a piece like this in my collection. Could you bear to part with it?"
    That's when I knew.
    Either my principal had lost his mind, or someone had kidnapped the real Mr. Zero.

----