can disillusion him.â
Antonia sighed with irritation. âAre you deceiving yourselfâor trying to deceive me?â Caenis wisely made no reply. âHave you confided in anybody else? I thought you were friendly with that girl Veronica?â
With a pang of resentment, Caenis finally grasped how nearly her friendship with Veronica had jeopardised her post. She took the opportunity to speak up: âVeronica has a good heart. I do like her, but that does not mean I admire her life. And she has never influenced mine, madam.â She smiled reassuringly. âI have never even mentioned Vespasian to Veronica.â
âI will not have my staff used by ambitious young men,â declared Antonia, though she liked people who stood up to her; she could be weakening.
Caenis decided to show she was shrewd. âI value my position too highly to risk it through foolishness. Besides, madam, if your court is seen as a desirable forum for young men who wish to advance in public lifeâas it must beâthen he and his brother have obtained their entrée anyway. Somebody, their father perhaps, has ensured that they are taken up by Vitellius. Vespasian cannot believe knowing me will improve on that.â
Now her mistress seemed amused. âThen, my dear, what does he want?â
âI suppose, what they all want,â Caenis decided, so as two women together they laughed and nodded distrustfully. âHe will be due for a disappointment! Madam, if he intends to pick my brains for your secrets, I shall certainly give him a sharp answer. I believe he knowsthat. Noâas I told you, I suspect he is just a young man who lacks friends in Rome. I am under no delusions; once he finds his feet in society that will be the end of me.â
âYou seem to have worked everything out.â
âI think a girl in my position has to,â Caenis said quietly.
Antonia, who favoured Caenis strongly, and who disliked having to involve herself in the private lives of her staff, seemed to tire of the conversation. âWell, you were right to speak to me. I have no wish to deprive you of companionship. But rank must be respectedââ
âI am a slave,â Caenis agreed quietly. âIf he wants a mistress, he has to look elsewhere.â
âSo long as you accept it. So long as you make him accept it too! Donât let him ask questions.â Donât get pregnant, thought Antonia. Donât force me to discipline you; donât betray my trust. âAnd donât let yourself be hurt.â
Squaring up the writing tablets on her knee, Caenis laughed unhappily. âThank you, madam.â
âCaenis, you undervalue yourself!â
In the girl before her Antonia saw what Vespasian must seeâthat fine, bright, interesting look that marked an intelligent woman; a look which in drawing the eye also lifted the heart. A man with the taste to admire such quality was more dangerous than any philanderer or hustler.
With an angry jerk at the cushions under her back, Antonia conceded, âAsk Athenaïs to find you something decent to wear.â
Caenis felt startled. She had been intending to borrow Veronicaâs best blue gown, since she knew that Veronica had worked herself an invitation to a function which required only a silver anklet and a wisp of gauze.
âSomething will be found for you,â Antonia brusquely said again.
Then, much as she distrusted other peopleâs support, Caenis understood that in speaking out she had softened Antoniaâs strict principles. Her mistress would keep her, and indulge her. She had earned more than her ladyâs goodwill. She had become her favourite.
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Something
was found; something wonderful. Athenaïs, who mended Antoniaâs clothes, carried the garment to her cubicle. Her face split with a shy grin. âPamphila has screwed up her face and let you have this!â Pamphila was the wardrobe