The Kaisho by Eric Van Lustbader Read Free Book Online Page B

thought of Justine’s unhappiness was as painful as the sight of a stunned sparrow. He put his hand across his eyes as he closed them. Even this far from her he could feel her distress like a child’s cry in the night. And yet there was a kind of abyss between them, dark and unfathomable. How long had it been there? Nicholas, beginning to slide into Tau-tau, tasted it, found it as familiar as an old jacket. With a start, he realized that it had begun to form at the time he had discovered he was tanjian. Was he slipping further away from the world most people knew? Were his explorations of the Tau-tau universe giving rise to a form of anomie from which he could not extricate himself? He did not think so, and yet there was that abyss yawning between him and Justine.
    Sometimes, his anger at Justine was palpable. She had been in Japan for years now, yet she had failed to make the requisite effort in joining in. She had no Japanese friends of her own—save Nangi, and that was at his instigation and continuing effort. She still exhibited the Westerner’s typical bewilderment at the complex net of customs, courtesies, and expressions of respect that defined Japanese society. And worst of all, she was beginning to exhibit that kind of blind impatience and outright resentment toward the Japanese that Nicholas had witnessed in a number of American business contacts.
    As Kansatsu had taught him, he began the journey inward, until he reached kokoro, the heart of all things. Then he selected the proper rhythm, began to beat at the membrane of kokoro, creating the psychic resonance that would transform thought into deed.
    Sinking deeper into Akshara, the reverberations of kokoro filling the space around him, Nicholas’s consciousness expanded until it filled the entire gym, then burst beyond the confining walls. In his mind he saw the city stretched out before him, and then, as if he were gathering enormous speed, the image of its bustling sprawl blurred. That familiar sensation of confinement fell away as, with a burst of psychic energy, he broke through the womb of time.
    Outside in the spangled darkness, past, present, and future existed only as meaningless definitions of concepts that did not exist. He did not yet know his way through this space or how to utilize most effectively its infinite horizons. That would take many years of trial and error. Instruction would have been preferable, of course, but the only other tanjian who had been qualified to teach him was now dead at his own hands and the inexorable forces of Tau-tau.
    How long Nicholas spent in exploration of his new world it was difficult to say because time as humans knew it did not correspond in that state. They had a taste of what it was like to be Outside in the midst of dreams when hours, even days, could seemingly be compressed into the space of microseconds.
    When he again opened his eyes, he felt refreshed and invigorated; the ghost of Justine’s unhappiness was a scent in the air soon dissipated.
    During his workout, the cordless phone at one end of the gym rang several times, and even though he knew the calls must be for him, he ignored them. His staff was used to his eccentric schedules, and they understood that if he did not answer, he should only be disturbed in case of a full-scale emergency.
    He stood beneath a cold shower, took a steam, then showered again and dressed in new clothes. Even the terrible image of his infant daughter as she took her last gasping breath had been expunged for a time.
    Seiko was waiting for him outside the gymnasium. True to her work ethic, she had taken several folders of paperwork, and while she sat on a low rung of the spiral stairs, she industriously made notes, corrections, and scheduling rearrangements for her boss.
    “Seiko,” Nicholas said.
    She jumped up, slammed her folders shut, and bowed deeply, then pulled her gleaming hair back from her neck. Her beauty, seeming so fragile because of her translucent skin,