The Manifesto on How to be Interesting by Holly Bourne Read Free Book Online Page B

her mother. Her mum seemed so satisfied by such shallow stuff, like good wallpaper and toned thighs, rather than her husband being around, or having a purpose to her life beyond shopping. And apart from all that inconvenient unconditional love stuff getting in the way, Bree was quite sure she didn’t like her mother either. How can you like someone you have no respect for? The sad thing was, Bree knew her mother was equally disappointed in how Bree had turned out. She’d no doubt longed for a daughter just like Jassmine Dallington. Some perfect plastic cut-out she could get pedicures with. Instead she’d got Bree. With her embarrassing stripy tights, slammed bedroom doors and sneering judgements.
    Oh well. Who didn’t have issues with their mother?
    Bacon sandwich demolished, Bree set out on her day’s challenge. She pulled on her duffel coat and marched out towards the high street. It was a crappy day – drizzle-tastic. The sort of day that made the pretty girls squeal and hold folders over their heads and then whinge about their hair frizzing like it was the worst thing in the world, when, somewhere, children were dying of Aids in Africa. But Bree was learning that people don’t find Africa and Aids very interesting. Not unless some celebrity – with non-frizzy hair – goes over there with a TV crew and starts blubbing for Comic Relief. Bree was trying to be more interesting. So she put Africa to the back of her mind and powerwalked to the local DVD shop.
    Change hadn’t hit their sheltered, privileged town just yet. As DVD chains closed around the country, their posh independent store continued to thrive, customers still tempted in by the decorated boxes of organic chocolate buttons and gourmet popcorn to rent the latest films.
    As she pushed through the shop doors, Bree felt kind of dirty, like she was walking into a sex shop or something. She’d been here eight million times before. She and Holdo came almost every weekend while everyone else their age got pissed at parties they would never be invited to. But Bree wasn’t going to their usual section – the corner dedicated to foreign films and independent cinema. No. She was going to a more shameful corner. One that, until today, she wouldn’t be caught dead in.
    Romantic comedies.
    She was immediately overwhelmed by the bubblegum pink colour. It was on every DVD case in some form, alongside giggling airbrushed actresses. Bree pulled one case out and flipped it over to read the blurb.
    â€œGive me an L, O, V and an E.”
    Angela always thought there was nothing more important than cheerleading. Until she met Kirk – star quarterback of her school’s biggest rival football team. Uh-oh. Suddenly her seemingly-perfect life is turned upside down when she has to decide between her two biggest loves. But who will win her heart? Pom-poms or the Prom King?
    â€œOh Philip Larkin,” Bree whispered. “We’re not in Kansas any more.”
    Bree was almost ill with judgement. As she read the four-star review from Teen Here magazine, it practically oozed from every pore. Yet, despite the film’s lack of original storyline and any semblance of three-dimensional characters, Bree couldn’t ignore the other reviews on the case:
    Blockbuster smash.
    Cinema hit of the year.
    And she couldn’t forget overhearing girls at school raving about it in the corridors. In fact, if she remembered correctly, the film was so popular someone had started a cheerleading club. It had run for two terms.
    People liked this stuff.
    It was interesting.
    Bree grabbed the DVD case and shoved it under her armpit. She spent a good twenty minutes picking out more – reading each blurb carefully before adding it to her bulging stash. Eventually satisfied, she dumped her bundle on the cashier’s desk.
    â€œYou having a girly sleepover?” he asked, stuffing 10 Things I Hate About You into one of the shop’s