The Multi-Orgasmic Couple: Sexual Secrets Every Couple Should Know by Mantak Chia, Maneewan Chia, Douglas Abrams, Rachel Carlton Abrams Read Free Book Online
below their optimum body weight. It is also important to remember that these “ideal” images are relative within time and culture. Female movie stars and models fifty years ago in the United States weighed on average 20 percent more than they do now and were much closer to their optimum body weight.
Within other cultures many different body types (large breasts or small breasts, large lips or small lips, large hips or small hips) are revered. It is our curves that make us womanly, and most men (and women) prefer a lot more flesh on their partners than the media portray. Later in this chapter, we will get to know and love our body as an integral part of increasing our desire and our pleasure.
Just as the other spheres of our life affect our sexuality, our sexuality can positively affect every other aspect of our life. A sexually satis fi ed woman is much happier and more optimistic, not to mention a better partner, mother, or worker.
Every body, no matter what size and shape, is capable of giving and receiving pleasure.
Building Desire: Exploring Your Erotic Potential
The first step toward multiple orgasms and a more satisfying sexual life lies in increasing our powers of desire. In the following exercises, you will explore your erotic potential. This exercise is useful no matter how much desire you currently experience.
For those of you who worry that you have “too much” desire, you should know that the Taoists considered having strong desire to be a great blessing and a wellspring of energy for cultivating our physical, emotional, and spiritual life. While sexual desire can be distracting (and even annoying) when it is unsatisfied or unable to be expressed, learning to mobilize this energy for your benefit will transform your life. Increased sexual energy, or ching, can be transformed into physical energy, or chi, for improving our body’s health and well-being. The more desire and energy we have, the more vitality we can experience. The Healing Love practice will give you access to your sex-ual energy when and where you want and will allow you to channel any remaining sexual energy into your creative, emotional, and spiritual life. We will demonstrate how to transform our sexual energy in chapter 3.
If you find that you consistently have more desire than your partner, you will want to encourage him to read this book and The Multi-Orgasmic Man. When men learn to become multi-orgasmic (without ejaculating), they find that they have a great deal more sexual desire and are much more able to satisfy their partners. Men are also often distracted by work and other pressures, so it is important for both of you to take time to focus on your sexual life away from these other demands.
Most of us are strongly influenced by the attitudes about sexuality we encountered as children. The comfort or discomfort with bodily pleasure of the adults around us sent strong messages about the value of desire and sexuality. What kind of model did your parents or other adults in your life provide of a committed, sexual relationship?
In addition to providing models of a sexual relationship, parents have varying attitudes toward the sensual and sexual potential of their growing children. Consider the role of touch in your family. Was there lots of jovial hugging or very little physical contact? Did you experience touch as welcome affection or was it sometimes uncomfortable?
In addition to our family, the wider cultural attitudes regarding sexuality also have a lasting influence on our sexuality. Whether we accept these attitudes or rebel against them, they still shape our sexual selves.
Our sexuality grows out of our unique sexual history, the situations and
Exer cise 4
YOUR EROTIC FINGERPRINT
Answer each of these questions for yourself as a means to understanding your unique sexuality. You may wish to write down the answers to these questions, or you may wish to simply answer them in your head. It might be helpful to start
Within other cultures many different body types (large breasts or small breasts, large lips or small lips, large hips or small hips) are revered. It is our curves that make us womanly, and most men (and women) prefer a lot more flesh on their partners than the media portray. Later in this chapter, we will get to know and love our body as an integral part of increasing our desire and our pleasure.
Just as the other spheres of our life affect our sexuality, our sexuality can positively affect every other aspect of our life. A sexually satis fi ed woman is much happier and more optimistic, not to mention a better partner, mother, or worker.
Every body, no matter what size and shape, is capable of giving and receiving pleasure.
Building Desire: Exploring Your Erotic Potential
The first step toward multiple orgasms and a more satisfying sexual life lies in increasing our powers of desire. In the following exercises, you will explore your erotic potential. This exercise is useful no matter how much desire you currently experience.
For those of you who worry that you have “too much” desire, you should know that the Taoists considered having strong desire to be a great blessing and a wellspring of energy for cultivating our physical, emotional, and spiritual life. While sexual desire can be distracting (and even annoying) when it is unsatisfied or unable to be expressed, learning to mobilize this energy for your benefit will transform your life. Increased sexual energy, or ching, can be transformed into physical energy, or chi, for improving our body’s health and well-being. The more desire and energy we have, the more vitality we can experience. The Healing Love practice will give you access to your sex-ual energy when and where you want and will allow you to channel any remaining sexual energy into your creative, emotional, and spiritual life. We will demonstrate how to transform our sexual energy in chapter 3.
If you find that you consistently have more desire than your partner, you will want to encourage him to read this book and The Multi-Orgasmic Man. When men learn to become multi-orgasmic (without ejaculating), they find that they have a great deal more sexual desire and are much more able to satisfy their partners. Men are also often distracted by work and other pressures, so it is important for both of you to take time to focus on your sexual life away from these other demands.
Most of us are strongly influenced by the attitudes about sexuality we encountered as children. The comfort or discomfort with bodily pleasure of the adults around us sent strong messages about the value of desire and sexuality. What kind of model did your parents or other adults in your life provide of a committed, sexual relationship?
In addition to providing models of a sexual relationship, parents have varying attitudes toward the sensual and sexual potential of their growing children. Consider the role of touch in your family. Was there lots of jovial hugging or very little physical contact? Did you experience touch as welcome affection or was it sometimes uncomfortable?
In addition to our family, the wider cultural attitudes regarding sexuality also have a lasting influence on our sexuality. Whether we accept these attitudes or rebel against them, they still shape our sexual selves.
Our sexuality grows out of our unique sexual history, the situations and
Exer cise 4
YOUR EROTIC FINGERPRINT
Answer each of these questions for yourself as a means to understanding your unique sexuality. You may wish to write down the answers to these questions, or you may wish to simply answer them in your head. It might be helpful to start
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