found himself saying, “I was getting married. I built it for my fiancée.” He said the words almost defiantly.
Edie made a small sound. Otherwise she didn’t move, didn’t speak.
“It was supposed to be the perfect house,” he went on, his tone as harsh as his feelings. He’d intended it to be his gift to her. He’d wanted it to be perfect. As perfect as she was.
Amy had laughed at that. “Don’t be silly,” she’d said. “I’m far from perfect.”
But he’d thought she was. Absolutely perfect in every way. She was certainly perfect for him.
So he’d made her tell him everything she’d ever dreamed of having in a house—the expansive picture windows looking out across Long Island Sound, the winding staircase, the second-story balcony overlooking the naturally landscaped pool. The massive stone fireplace, the island-centered kitchen, the three upstairs bedrooms—a suite for them and one each for the children they would have—he was determined they would all be exactly as she wanted them.
“Her heart’s desire,” he said bitterly now.
“But it wasn’t?” Edie ventured softly.
He shrugged. “She didn’t care. Oh, she was delighted about the house, thought it was a great idea. But mostly she just wanted to get married. And I kept putting it off. I wanted the house finished. I wanted it all just right.”
Not because he didn’t want to marry her. He had. But he’d wanted to give her the very best he had to offer. He’d thought it was worth waiting for.
He’d been wrong.
The inadequacy of that house compared to the time he couldhave had with her still gutted him. He ground his teeth, cracked his knuckles. Swallowed hard.
“What happened?” Edie asked quietly.
“She died.”
He said the words baldly. Forced himself to confront the mistake he’d made. He didn’t look at Edie. This wasn’t about her. It was about him. And Amy.
For a long moment Edie didn’t say anything, either. Nick wasn’t surprised. What, after all, was there to say?
He should have kept his own mouth shut. He couldn’t imagine what he’d been thinking, dragging out his private pain for a woman he’d known less than a couple of hours.
“Forget it,” he muttered. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“I asked.” She reached out, touched his arm. “I am so very sorry,” she told him.
A lot of people had said they were sorry. But Edie’s words didn’t sound like a platitude. He could hear the earnestness in her voice, and there was something so close to pain in her tone that it surprised him. He turned to look at her.
“You lost her,” Edie said, “and you lost your own future as well.”
“Yes.” It was something that no one else seemed to get. He wasn’t the one who had died, after all. He should just get on with his life. If they didn’t say it—and some did before many months had passed—he could see it in the way they looked at him, in the suggestions for dates, in the offers to set him up with eligible women.
“I understand,” she said.
He doubted it. “Thank you,” he said politely and looked away out the window.
“My husband died two years ago.”
Nick’s gaze snapped back, shocked, to meet hers. His “I’m sorry” felt as feeble and inadequate as a platitude now. “I didn’t know.”
“I don’t generally announce it,” Edie said lightly. Then she gave him a faint smile. “I don’t suppose you do, either.”
“No.” It had been, literally, years since he’d talked about Amy to anyone. Now he paused, considering. “That was why you were upset about Mona’s matchmaking?”
She thinks I need to start dating again.
Nick remembered Edie’s earlier words. Remembered wondering about the
again
. Now he knew.
She hesitated, then nodded. “Yes.”
He understood. It made perfect sense. He didn’t look at her. He didn’t think she was looking at him. She was probably thinking about the husband she’d lost much more recently than he’d lost Amy.
And he