The She-Hulk Diaries by Marta Acosta Read Free Book Online Page A

another smeery look. She waved toward the windows with their stunning view of Manhattan, which still look my breath away, especially at times like this, with a new flurry of snow sparkling in the winter light on building ledges and cornices.
    She said, “The vast majority of the human population is satisfied with the banalities of an average life. One day blurs into the next, one week is indistinguishable from another. Their existence consists of waiting for the weekend, then waiting for retirement, and then waiting for death.”
    Well, hell, she almost made me want to throw myself out the window and let buzzards eat my carcass. Or, considering the geography, rats and pigeons, eww.
    Quinty Quintal peeked at his gold watch and gave me a wink. Something about him seemed familiar, and not just from his photos.
    Amber continued spewing. “Only an exceptional few have the intelligence, skill, and determination to succeed in a place like QUIRC. Do you really believe you’re that rarity, Ms. Walters?”
    I wished I could give her a Valley Girl
fer sure
, but I said, “My record of successes speaks for itself, Ms. Tumbridge.”
    She wasn’t ready to STFU yet. “We are aware of your friendship with a certain notorious superhuman, but celebrity connections will not factor into our decision.”
    Shulky kicked me behind my eyeballs, and I said, “The appropriate term for She-Hulk is super
hero
, not the generic super
human
, since her efforts have saved humanity from destruction on numerous occasions. However, I expect no favors because of my outside relationships.”
    Quinty said, “Ms. Walters, I’m very impressed with your UCLA degree—go Bruins!—and with your LLM from Harvard, a very nice
private
school.” He lifted one bushy eyebrow. “I know that your experience at Goodman, Lieber, Kurtzburg, & Holliway prepared you for our grueling schedule. Anyone good enough for Holden Holliway is good enough for me.”
    He chuckled, and everyone but Amber obediently chuckled along, and then he said, “Ms. Walters, if you’re as smart as I think you are, you’re aware of our impending action against ReplaceMax Laboratories.”
    I sat up straight. “Yes, I’ve heard that you were planning a suit against their organ cloning division.”
    “I can’t reveal details about our plans, but Maxwell Kirsch continues to stand by ReplaceMax’s defective products,” Quinty said. “If anyone should take ReplaceMax on, the fight will be dirty and brutal.”
    I felt the thrill that I get when I’m challenged in court. I looked Quinty in the eye and said, “If I worked for QUIRC, sir, and you had a case against ReplaceMax, I’d say, ‘Bring it!’ ” I let that hang there, gazing slowly around the room to let them all know that I was ready to crush any opposition.
    Why can’t I have that kind of confidence all the time?
    Half an hour later, the senior partner was saying, “Call me Quinty,” and escorting me to the minimalist lobby. “Ms. Walters, I can’t speak for the others, but I’d be delighted to have you onboard.”
    It wasn’t “We want to hire you,” but it was encouraging, and I said, “Call me Jennifer.”
    “Jennifer, after hearing about your reputation, I thought you’d be a battle-scarred warrior, not a soft-spoken young lady. You’re quite a catch, you know. Legally, I mean.”
    Quinty’s eyes had a sort of
Mad Men
glint—a far-off expression thatmen get when they’re nostalgic for the days when they could pinch a girl’s ass and ask for a martini and a blowjob. I wondered what he’d looked like when he was in his prime.
    I didn’t have to wonder for long. The elevator pinged, the doors slid open, and a taller, brawnier, younger version of Quinty stepped out. A version that looked
exactly
like Ellis Tesla, down to the scar across his right eyebrow.
    Ellis Tesla stepped out of the elevator.
    Allow me to repeat: Ellis smoking-hot-rockin’-sex-god-and-star-of-my-most-fevered-fantasies Tesla stepped out