The Truth About Julia: A Chillingly Timely Psychological Novel by Schaffner Anna Read Free Book Online Page A

point, sexuality and all that hadn’t really featured much in our lives.
    Unsurprisingly, Julia’s seduction strategy worked completely according to plan. Josh, who’d probably just been shy about expressing his affection, or else was a little slow or something, was massively flattered by Julia’s perceived interest in him, and he chitchatted animatedly with her. He was totally ridiculous, and I remember that it really annoyed me, the way he kept casting proud glances around the room to check that everyone was taking notice that the coolest girl in the school was gracing him with her attention. As always on these occasions, I sat next to Julia and observed her every move. I’ve studied her very carefully over the years. When we were still close, I mean. Sometimes, she’d throw me a conspiratorial little smile. I was terribly thrilled and quite agitated. I knew that the next step would be for her to casually put her hand on Josh’s knee, whisper something in his ear, and then she’d lead him to his parents’ bedroom, and... you can imagine it. She’d even bought some condoms, because she didn’t think Josh was the type who would have any himself.
    And again, everything went just as we’d imagined it would. Before Julia left the room with Josh, she kissed me on the forehead and said: ‘You’ll be all right on your own for a bit, Amy, won’t you? I won’t be long – I promise.’ I’d never really been alone with her friends before, and didn’t know what to do with myself. I guess I must have looked lost and even sadder than usual because one of them, Tobias, took pity and sat down on the floor next to me. He was quite cute, and I actually really liked him. But almost immediately he began quizzing me about my sister – everybody only ever wants to talk about Julia with me. Even you, right? Anyway, Tobias asked all sorts of questions about her – what she was reading, what bands she liked, what perfume she wore, that kind of stuff. He jokingly offered me a bottle of beer, and looked terribly uneasy when I accepted it. I’d never drunk alcohol before, and it affected me immediately. Somehow, I allowed myself to believe that Tobias was actually interested in me rather than in Julia, and that she was simply the only shared topic of conversation we had at that point. Somehow, I even managed to convince myself that Tobias wasn’t just interested in me in a general kind of way, but interested in me sexually. I told you I was really bad at reading people. I blame it on the beer.
    Anyway. There I was sitting on the floor drinking beer with Tobias, in a little makeshift hippy outfit that Julia had put together for me. I was wearing this knee-length flower-patterned blouse of hers with a thin leather belt – it was supposed to be a dress – a few of Julia’s necklaces, and even some lipstick and mascara. No doubt I looked grotesque, like a little girl who’d just raided her mother’s wardrobe and played around with her make-up, or a prostitute child bride or something like that. But after having drunk half of my beer, I decided to seduce Tobias: I wanted him to kiss me. For once, I, too, would have something exciting I could tell Julia. I started to look at Tobias in the way I’d seen Julia look at Josh – a look that she’d practised on me the night before. I think he must have found that really amusing, and he started to be playfully flirtatious back. Very gently though, I should add. He wasn’t a bad person, and I still feel pretty guilty about what happened later. I was feeling increasingly dizzy. I kept swaying towards him half-deliberately and half-drunkenly, and I began to slur my words. Some of his friends were watching us. No doubt they were all laughing at me.
    ‘Kiss me,’ I said finally. ‘I want you to kiss me.’
    ‘Kiss you?’ Tobias laughed. ‘Amy, with all due respect, you’re a bit young for me.’
    ‘Just kiss me,’ I insisted. I was speaking louder than I had intended.
    ‘Come