The Untamed Earl by Valerie Bowman Read Free Book Online

said. “First of all, I severely dislike any man who drinks. Especially if he drinks to excess. It’s vulgar.”
    Alexandra kept her face completely still. Of course her sister disliked drinking. Lavinia hated all fun. “I see,” Alexandra replied simply.
    â€œAnd he cannot be overbearing. I detest an overbearing sort.”
    Takes one to know one.
    Lavinia flipped her hands back over, indicating for Martha to proceed with the second coat. “Gambling of any sort is completely out of the question. It’s an absolute abomination.”
    â€œOf course.” Alexandra nodded. That was not news to her; she’d had her own unfortunate incident in which her sister had discovered her gambling—or more precisely, encouraging others to gamble—and raised holy hell. Again, Lavinia was the opposite of fun.
    â€œCursing and a bad temper are also entirely unacceptable,” Lavinia continued.
    Ah yes, only one of them could curse and have a bad temper in Lavinia’s marriage. Alexandra had to smother her smile at that thought.
    â€œI detest dancing,” Lavinia added thoughtfully. “I cannot abide a gentleman who is forever endeavoring to ask me to dance.”
    It’s one of my favorite things, Alexandra thought wistfully. “What, specifically, do you object to when it comes to dancing?” Alexandra couldn’t help but ask.
    Lavinia flared her nostrils and glared at her. “There are much better things to do with one’s time than dance.”
    â€œSuch as?”
    â€œSuch as anything!” Lavinia’s voice rose sharply, and Alexandra quickly decided to abandon that line of questioning.
    â€œVery well, what else do you require in a gentleman?” Alexandra said.
    Lavinia pressed her lips together. “I adore poetry. The man who wins my heart must write me not only poetry but ballads as well.”
    â€œBallads?” Alexandra wrinkled her nose. The maid gave her mistress a questioning sideways glance.
    â€œYes, love ballads. I adore them,” Lavinia said. “And he must bring me flowers every time he comes to see me. Scads and scads of flowers. Not those sad little offerings from the park, but large, lovely ones he has carted in from his conservatory in the country.”
    Alexandra shook her head. Of course, his conservatory. Because any man worthy of Lavinia would be the proud owner of a conservatory filled with large, gorgeous flowers with which to woo her.
    â€œAnd he must be a fine horseman,” Lavinia continued. “You know how much I adore my dear Bonnie in the country.”
    It was true. The only living thing her sister seemed to cherish was her horse. “Is there anything else?”
    â€œAll the normal things, of course. He must be handsome, titled, honorable. He cannot live too far away. I shouldn’t like to travel a great distance to visit Mother and Father. That would be terribly inconvenient.”
    Mustn’t inconvenience her.
    â€œAnd he shouldn’t be of such a strong mind that he won’t allow me to redecorate our country house as I see fit.”
    Never think it.
    â€œHe shouldn’t be too terribly interested in politics. I shouldn’t like to have to discuss such boring subjects at every dinner party.”
    The horror.
    â€œWhat about wit?” Alexandra offered.
    Lavinia bared her teeth. “Wit? Why would I want that? Wit is overrated.”
    No, it’s not. “Anything else?”
    â€œI prefer a man with an artist’s heart who can speak to me about horses and poetry with equal verve. Someone with soft hands who might play me a love ballad on a mandolin.” She sighed and stared dreamily off toward her pink wallpaper.
    An artist’s heart? What did that mean? And a mandolin? Really? Alexandra and Martha exchanged another skeptical glance. Her sister’s perfect groom didn’t sound appealing to Alexandra in the least. Though, thankfully, he also