The Warrior Sheep Go West by Christopher Russell Read Free Book Online

livestock?”
    â€œCan’t do it any more damage than your driving. Come on, grab a leg.”
    Cameron reluctantly did as he was asked, and between them the brothers heaved Sal off the ground and onto the back seat. When she regained consciousness a few seconds later, she found herself forehead to curly forehead with Links, who’d been swung in beside her.
    â€œWhat’s happening, man?” he asked weakly.
    â€œI think we’ve had an out-of-body experience, dear…” replied Sal, before her voice and mind drifted away again.
    â€œOh,” said Links. “I thought we was just thirsty.”
    Then Jaycey was being lowered in between them. “I am sooo not fat…” she continued to murmur. “Sooo not fat…”
    The car dipped and swayed as Oxo, having staggered to his feet, clambered on board with a helping shoulder from Phoenix, and wedged himself next to Links on the back seat.
    â€œOne to go,” said Phoenix, scooping up Wills.
    â€œWell you’ll just have to have him on your lap, bro,” replied Cameron. “ I’m still driving.” And he got in quickly behind the wheel.
    Wills didn’t mind sitting on a lap, and he was feeling better now that his heart had stopped hammering. His tongue still felt like a lump of wood in his parched mouth but he lifted his head and gazed through the windscreen. The air that ruffled his fleece as the car suddenly shot backward and swung round onto the road again was still hot but quite refreshing. He sat up straight to catch more of it. Behind him, the other warriors were also struggling upright to catch the welcome breeze.
    â€œDo we have any water left?” asked Phoenix.
    â€œOnly juice,” said Cameron.
    Phoenix pulled a handful of plastic bottles from the cool box by his feet and held one in front of Wills. It had a sucker top and, after a few false starts, Wills managed to suck up some liquid. Cameron stopped the car and both boys leaned around to offer bottles to the other sheep. They sucked desperately, finally got the hang of it, and drank, relieving their parched tongues and throats.
    Jaycey dropped her empty bottle and stared, mesmerized, at Cameron’s sunglasses. How cool were they? Cooler than those silly old ear studs Oxo and Sal were wearing. She fluttered her eyelids and tossed her pretty head.
    Cameron grinned, faced the front again and aimed the car West. “Aries, Aries, Rams, Ewes, and Lambs!” he sang. “Tell you what, Phee, they make the greatest mascots.”
    In the back seat, Sal, who didn’t understand much humanspeak, stiffened.
    â€œUh, Wills dear,” she asked anxiously, leaning forward, “what exactly are mascots?”
    Wills couldn’t remember. But he didn’t think they were cut up and cookable, so he relaxed, letting his ears flap in the wind, and his tongue lick the last of the juice from his no-longer-parched lips.
    Cameron thought roads were boring and constantly veered off to take the car jolting away across the stony desert, dodging boulders and cacti with last-second spins of the steering wheel. The warriors, even Sal, loved every minute of the ride, and when Cameron leaned round and stuck his shades on Jaycey’s head, she thought she’d gone to Sheep Heaven.
    â€œCool wheels, man,” yelled Links.
    â€œExcellent,” called back Wills.
    The car sped on with the humans chanting and the sheep bleating and the sun burning in the blue sky above. They saw no other traffic until Cameron turned the car toward the road for the last time.
    â€œWave, guys,” he yelled, turning the music up even louder. “Some dude’s coming our way.”
    ***
    Holly Boomberg couldn’t remember where she’d last seen hoofprints. Before the billboards, she thought, but she’d gone way past them before she’d realized and turned back. Now she was angry with herself and driving fast, peering at the dusty