Until Now by Rebecca Phillips Read Free Book Online

flinched at my tone, but I didn’t care. Alan Madsen had never been, and never would be, my father. My father drowned during a drunken late night swim when I was fifteen months old, and out of all the men my mother had paraded through my life since, none of them had been decent enough to replace him. “My step father isn’t home yet. He said he’d be here around noon.”
    She sniffed indignantly, and for a moment I almost understood why she didn’t like me. I detached Drake from my leg and nudged him toward his still-smiling grandpa, then excused myself to finish packing. For the next twenty minutes, I alternately fumed and cried as I stuffed shirts and pants and stuffed animals into the twins’ luggage. I also added plenty of Pull-Ups; Drake had been waking up soaked all week.
    Would they shame him for that? I wondered. I mean, these people had raised Alan, and he was fundamentally a bastard.
    A door closed downstairs, followed by a familiar, booming voice. Speak of the bastard.
    When I returned downstairs, suitcases in hand, Alan had a twin in each arm and the three of them were all smiles. Lila and Drake adored Alan the way little kids loved their daddies before they were old enough to see the man behind the perfunctory hugs and presents. He was like Santa, elusive and revered, dropping in for a night to leave gifts for the children before disappearing once again.
    Alan nodded at me in greeting and I responded with a pointed glare. He looked away quickly, focusing again on the twins. “You guys ready to spend a few days at Grandma and Grandpa’s house?” he asked, setting them on the floor.
    “Yeah!” they exclaimed, caught up in the excitement.
    The grandmother came over to me as I deposited the suitcases near the door. “Robin,” she said, leaning close enough that I could smell her cloying old-lady perfume. “I think it would be best if you didn’t contact the twins for a while. Give them some time to settle in and adjust.”
    I blinked at her. She couldn’t be serious. “How long is a while?”
    “As long as it takes,” she said, which didn’t really answer my question at all.
    I turned away, ignoring her. The woman had a lot of nerve. If she thought I was going to just hand over my brother and sister and forget about them, she clearly didn’t know me very well.
    “Better get on the road soon,” the grandfather said, patting Lila’s head. I guess he wasn’t so bad, in a reserved, cowed-by-an-overbearing-wife kind of way. “We’ll stop for lunch first, how does that sound?”
    Drake grinned and ran over to grab my hand. “Come on, Robin. We’re going to eat lunch.”
    My heart stuttered. Oh God. They thought I was coming with them.
    I kneeled down in front of him, hoping he wouldn’t notice my bloodshot eyes. “It’s just you and LaLa going with Grandma and Grandpa, Drakey. I’m staying here.”
    His chocolate eyes welled up and he let out a tiny gasp. The sound of it stabbed at my heart. “You come too,” he said, bottom lip trembling. Lila, hearing the panic in her brother’s voice, left her father’s side to join us. I hugged them both to me.
    “I’ll see you guys soon, okay?” The words caught in my throat, choking me. As I held them, I glanced up at our audience. Alan’s mother looked at me like I’d upset the kids on purpose while Alan and his father peered at the floor, uncomfortable.
    “They have to get going,” Alan said coolly. “It’s a long drive.”
    I ignored him, ignored everyone and everything except Drake and Lila. “I love you both,” I told them, giving them each a kiss on the cheek. Sensing my distress, they both clung to me and started crying in earnest.
    “Okay,” Alan said, unhooking all twenty of their fingers from me and hefting them up. “Say goodbye to your sister.”
    They continued to cry, reaching for me, and that was all I could handle. I pressed my lips to their foreheads one last time and then ran upstairs, their sobs following me up each