What a Mother Knows by Leslie Lehr Read Free Book Online Page A

the In-N-Out bag, then set out the prescription bottle like a condiment. “Want Tyler’s shake?”
    She sat back down at the dinette while he grabbed a beer from the fridge. He pushed the vanilla shake toward her, then unwrapped his double burger and dumped a haystack of fries beside it. The shake reminded her too much of the protein drinks that she’d grown to hate at the rehab center. She stole a french fry, which tasted a lot saltier than she remembered. She consoled herself that this was like a second date with her husband—if only she were in the mood. All the hope she had yesterday was gone. She could say words out loud and swallow bits of potato, but all the while, a dead boy hovered in her thoughts. Maybe he always would.
    She eyed the prescription bottle. The promise of relief was tempting. She had no idea what had happened, and even if she did, she could never bring Noah back. But she could try to find her daughter. And she needed to be clearheaded to do that.
    She took a deep breath and pulled the dangling disco ball earring from her pocket. The mirrors reflected sparkling light across Drew’s hamburger.
    â€œWhat’s that?”
    Michelle hesitated, surprised that he didn’t recognize it. “An earring from Nikki’s jewelry box. It doesn’t look familiar?”
    â€œShe didn’t wear earrings,” Drew said. “Remember how mad she was when I gave her the sapphire studs? You said it was the September birthstone.”
    â€œIt is,” Michelle said, toying with the clip. “But she was so proud about being natural—no pierced ears, no tattoos. She was disappointed you didn’t notice. If she were here, she’d be eating a cheeseburger without the burger. Hold the lettuce and tomato.”
    â€œRight. A vegetarian who doesn’t like vegetables. Except in the form of ketchup.” Drew squeezed a packet of red goop over his fries.
    â€œRemember the night she announced it?” Michelle said, pleased to reminisce. “We were having your favorite Sunday dinner, pork chops and mashed potatoes, and you complained that she didn’t appreciate it. Then she fell off her chair.”
    Drew frowned. “She did that on purpose, to change the subject.”
    â€œNo, she didn’t. She’d get so excited talking about something and she’d be swinging her leg and—boom. On the floor.” Michelle nearly smiled. “Always cracked Tyler up.”
    â€œMaybe that’s why she did it. For attention.”
    â€œNo.” Michelle shook her head. He had it all wrong. Nikki was shy, always had been. Even at preschool, when Michelle dropped Nikki off at the gate, she hung back from the children shouting hello. The Greta Garbo of the play yard, her teacher teased. No wonder Drew hadn’t found Nikki—he was out of town so much that he hardly knew her. In a way, that gave Michelle hope. She clipped the disco ball earring on a tall orchid branch.
    â€œWhere is the filing cabinet? Maybe there’s something in her old class rosters. Or her debit card statements.”
    Drew cut her off. “There’s not. I left the house files here, but everything else is in New York.” His eyes met hers, as if in apology. For a moment, they let the sadness surround them.
    Michelle held the look, wishing he would put his arms around her. Instead, he plucked Variety off the stack of trade magazines he’d bought at the store. “You mind?”
    â€œCan I look, too? I went from flash cards to large print books, as if the outside world didn’t exist. But don’t you read the news online?”
    â€œThere’s no Internet service here.”
    â€œNo wonder Tyler doesn’t want to stick around. Will you order it?”
    â€œYou don’t need it, Michelle. Rest and do your exercises.”
    â€œI will, but Nikki’s high school directory was online. And kids she knew on Facebook.” She tried to