What If

What If by Rebecca Donovan Read Free Book Online

Book: What If by Rebecca Donovan Read Free Book Online
Authors: Rebecca Donovan
Tags: Fiction, General, Romance
they’re usually really nice. It’s just…” I shrug and attempt to pick up the pace, wanting to get to the Student Union faster so we can stop talking about the girls I’ve dated.
    “Then why did you end things, because I’m assuming
you
ended it.”
    “Usually,” I say, barely audible.
    “So…” Nyelle pushes, not letting the subject drop. She stops walking just as we’re within sight of the doors. “Tell me. What happened?”
    I turn abruptly to face her and blurt, “They weren’t who I needed them to be, okay?”
    She examines me thoughtfully. “
Needed
them to be? What is that supposed to mean?”
    I groan. “Coming from the girl loaded with cryptic responses? I think I’ll leave it at that.” I keep walking without bothering to see if she follows.
    “Cal, tell me,” Nyelle begs from beside me as I search for an empty table. “Who do you need them to be?”
    I don’t answer her. I notice a couple of guys sliding out of a booth and walk over to claim the table before anyone else can. Nyelle sits down across from me as I set my backpack on the bench.
    “Are you hungry?” I ask. “I haven’t had breakfast yet.”
    She recognizes my avoidance and urges carefully, “I’m not judging, Cal. I swear. I’m interested in understanding why you’ve left a wreckage of broken hearts across campus.” I scoff, and her lips curl up into an innocent smile. “Tell me, please. Who are you looking for?”
    “I’ll be back,” I say, needing to stall this interrogation and decide if I’m willing to explain what I meant when I was a little too honest.
    I grab a couple breakfast sandwiches and a bottle of water, returning to the table to see her eagerly waiting for me with her chin propped on folded hands.
    Against my better judgment, I confess, “I’m looking for the girl I’ll regret if I let her go.”
    Nyelle ponders thoughtfully for a moment. “Your
what if
girl. I like it.”
    “My what?” I ask with a bite of the sandwich in my mouth.
    “Your
what if
girl. You serial date so you don’t regret passing these girls up, in case one of them is
her.

    I shrug. “I’ve never really thought about
why
I date them. Only why I don’t stay with them.”
    “Has there ever been a girl who got away?”
    I lean back in the booth and meet her intense gaze. I hesitate before answering, unable to be completely honest. “No. Not really.”
    “Not even from back home? Where are you from, anyway?”
    It takes all my effort not to choke on the food in my mouth when she asks this. I’m doing everything I can to think of her as Nyelle Preston and
not
Nicole Bentley, and then she asks a question that brings it all back, and I can’t help wanting to ask her what happened to her. But what if I scare her off and never see her again? It’s already hard enough not knowing
when
I’ll see her. I don’t want to blow it by asking the wrong question too soon. I have to wait until she’s ready to tell me.
    “I live in a small town in northern California, outside Sacramento.” I can’t look at her when I say it. It feels like I’m the one lying.
    “Wow. You’re far from home. Why would you choose Crenshaw?”
    “It’s a good school,” I say, without really answering the question. I could tell her I wanted to get away from my family, but I don’t. I like my family. I could say they specialized in my major, but I still don’t have one. “Truthfully, I was supposed to go to UCLA, but… I changed my mind at the last minute.”
    She smiles like I’ve revealed something interesting. “You made a random decision that could affect the rest of your life, just… because?”
    “I guess.” I shrug.
    “Did you serial date in high school too?”
    I burst out laughing. If there’s anything at all she should remember about me, it’s that I was far from the most desirable guy in school. Sure, I had a few girlfriends over the years, but…
    I continue to play along. “No,” I answer with a shake of my head. “I

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