When To Let Go by J.M. Sevilla Read Free Book Online Page B

way. They never told on each other either. Violet had no reason to lie to her, so why did it still not sit right with her? What was it about the Stones that had her siblings acting so strange?
     
    Parker wiped his palms on the front of his jeans for the hundredth time since the bus ride and walk to the juvenile corrections center where Ryder was.
    He was stressed about seeing Ryder, worried about how upset his sister must be and regretting that he had involved Violet in any of it. She was the only person besides Ryder who let him be himself. He also liked that she was the only person not giving him shit for his behavior. Behavior that he just couldn't seem to control.
    He needed the women he fucked just as much as he needed to feel bone crack against his knuckles. If it wasn't for being able to work on Violet's car, he'd alternate between the two every hour or the rage got to be too much to handle. His adoptive parents had tried therapy, but how the hell could some privileged old man in sweater vests ever understand or help him?
    He didn't purposely try to cause trouble with Naomi and Stevie, and he truly appreciated living with them over being on the streets or another foster home. They were way better for Ava than he was. They’d noticed she had a hard time with school, and after testing found out she had dyslexia. They'd gotten her the tutors and the help she needed to deal with it, and hopefully make school not so hard for her.
    Parker couldn't have done those things. He was grateful to them for that, and truthfully, if he could go back in time and not be adopted, he wouldn't change it.
    The women who adopted them would bleed themselves before they let someone hurt him or Ava, and that was pretty cool. He honestly thought they were pretty cool, he just didn't know how to let them in.
    Something he would never tell anyone was how nice it was to be able to go to sleep at night without any fear. He never had that before. Always having a full belly didn't hurt either.
    The part that stung most was knowing any kid could have been Ava's brother. Parker was nothing special, just the lucky one she was related to. They never would have adopted him otherwise.
    Of course he couldn't express that to anyone. He would have told Ryder, who would understand.
    Ryder...
    Parker stared at the property before him with its tall, wired fence. Gloom surrounded the place like a fog. He prayed some of the buildings with bigger windows were places Ryder got to spend a lot of time in. A place like that wasn't meant for kids who couldn't handle the slightest touch or who went into convulsions if they felt confined.
    He wiped his hands on his thighs again. It was a compulsive habit he had every time he felt he was losing control. He needed the control. Control kept the demons away.
    Parker arrived at visiting hours just in time. As he waited on an outside bench his palm-wiping was at its worst. Under the bench he rubbed them back and forth, callousing his skin against the rough fabric of his jeans, waiting for his brother to appear.
    He hadn't prepared himself for what he saw.
    It wasn't seeing Ryder in his garb or seeing him brought out to the area in handcuffs. It was the lack of life in him.
    Parker noticed it right away, and Ryder was still halfway across the yard.
    All he got when Ryder sat down was a nod of his head in acknowledgment. He stared past Parker as though he could care less he was there.
    His casual, aloof demeanor cut Parker deep. So deep he couldn't talk for several minutes.
    “They treating you okay in here?” His voice sounded hoarse, so Parker cleared it, refusing to let what was going on affect him.
    Ryder shrugged, “How 'bout you? How's Ava?”
    “Good. The couple treats us well.”
    “Good,” he nodded, still remaining distant. “That's great to hear.”
    “I need to know you're alright. I've spent two years worried about you.”
    Ryder's hazel, lifeless eyes blinked only once, “No need to. They've shot me up with