But it hasn’t been easy for him, either. He hears things at school. You know how it is. Kids can be so mean. My advice is to take it slow. He’ll need time to get used to you being back in his life.”
Denise turned onto Fox Valley Road, which hadn’t been resurfaced since Alice had last traveled it, judging from all the potholes. They splashed through one after another, each new, bone-jarring lurch seeming to echo Alice’s thoughts.
The only thing that had gotten her through all those years in prison was knowing she’d be coming home to Jeremy one day. Now apparently she was considered an intrusion. How was she supposed to deal with that? How did you take it slow when you only know one speed? “I’m not here to make things harder for him,” she said quietly, gripping tightly to the door handle as they bounced through yet another pothole, mud flying up to spatter the windshield.
“I know, hon. And I’m sure it’ll all work out. It’s just that it’s not going to happen overnight.” Denise reached over to pat her on the knee.
It was strange seeing Denise cast in the role of big sister. Growing up, she had been the one who could never get it together. Forever on a diet in the hope of being able to fit into smaller clothes, and in a perpetual state of disarray that extended from her flyaway hair to the mess on her side of the closet they’d shared. Now, glancing down at the trash littering the floor at her feet—torn receipts and crumpled straw wrappers, an empty coffee container and something that might have been a Barbie doll poking out from under a T-shirt—Alice saw that not much had changed. Yet Denise had become the stable one. The one with all the answers. While she, Alice, had none.
The rain had tapered off by the time they pulled up in front of Denise’s rambling farmhouse. It was a good halfhour’s drive from town, but, as Denise liked to say, where else could they have gotten such a spread? Ten acres with its own pond and a barn that housed a horse, chickens, and a pet pig named Mirabelle—a 4-H project that Taylor hadn’t been able to part with.
As she climbed out, Alice took note of Gary’s cruiser, parked next to one of those seventies’ gas-guzzlers, full of
dents, which had to be Ryan’s. Her anxiety mounted. She and Gary had in the past always gotten along well but she hadn’t seen him since she’d last been to this house and she didn’t know quite what to expect. Would he be standoffish or welcome her with open arms? There was another concern as well: He wasn’t just her brother-in-law; he was the law. And in prison, it was the law you answered to. Some of the COs had abused that power, seeming to take pleasure in harassing the inmates: writing up bogus charge sheets, giving out work orders when they knew you had a class or were expecting a visitor; making you wait for hours, sometimes days, for your meds. Even now, the thought of someone in uniform caused Alice to break into a sweat.
She was climbing the steps to the porch when the front door swung open and a figure emerged: a big man in jeans and a flannel shirt, square and solid as an appliance built to last. “Alice. Good to have you back.” Gary stepped forward to give her an awkward hug. He smelled of aftershave, his close-cropped sandy curls still damp from the shower. The receding hairline was the only concession to the years. That, and the few extra inches around his middle.
The wary look in his cop’s eyes didn’t match his words of welcome. He obviously had mixed feelings about her reemergence into their lives; Alice understood, and she didn’t blame him. It was awkward, given his line of work and who he ultimately answered to. “Good to be back,” she said, with forced cheer. “How have you been, Gary?”
“Oh, you know me. Just chugging along. Your sister keeps me busy when I’m not on patrol. If it were up to her, I wouldn’t have a moment to myself,” he teased, slinging an arm around Denise’s
Alexei Panshin, Cory Panshin