each other. Like it probably wasn’t even healthy.”
I frowned. “I wouldn’t say that. We were friends. We had a connection.”
“It was a little cray cray, you have to admit.”
I was offended. “I’m not admitting that. And you spend too much time on Tumblr. Lose the shorthand speech.”
“Whatev.”
“So can you do some poking around and see what you can find out about Heath now that we now he was in the Marines?” Tiffany was a computer savant. She could pick her way through the maze of social media and public records and find anything out about anyone.
“I could. Or you could just ask him. I mean, you’re going to see him, aren’t you? I know you.”
“Yes, I’m seeing me. But I don’t want to pry.”
“You’d rather stalk?”
Why was she making this so difficult? “Look, you don’t have to if you don’t want to,” I said in a bratty tone I immediately regretted.
She sighed. “I don’t want to, because I don’t want you to mess up your relationship with Ethan. But I will, because I know you want me to.”
“Thanks, Tiff. Don’t worry, okay? I just need closure. I never got that.” That’s why I was meeting Heath. To get the answers, and to say goodbye. To have the chance to say what he had denied me four years earlier.
“Okay. I get it. I will dig up whatever I can find.”
“When are you coming to Orono to visit me?” I asked, like I always did when we talked.
“Never,” she responded, like she always did. “You know I’m going to live and die in Vinalhaven.”
“You don’t have to. Only if you want to.”
“I want to.”
I wasn’t sure I believed her, but she was stubborn. “How is your grandma?”
Tiffany was responsible for taking care of the house and her grandmother, who had emphysema. I always thought it was a little suspicious that for years Tiffany had been shuffled around in foster care and her grandmother had never asked for custody, but when Tiff was fourteen and capable and her grandmother was on oxygen, suddenly she wanted her around. It seemed super selfish and shitty to me, but Tiffany chose to believe her grandmother had had a change of heart and had missed her, and I wasn’t about to take that away from her.
But it annoyed me that her life choices were limited because she felt chained to that hunk of rock we’d grown up on.
“My grandma’s okay. You know.”
“Yeah. I know.” That was about all I could say about my mother. She was okay. “So any cute guys that you’re interested in?”
“I may be interested, but it is not returned. Dudes aren’t dying to talk to me, Cat, and if they are, they’re creepers. I look like I’m twelve.”
She did. There was no real denying it. Tiff had been underfed most of her life and whether it was that or just genetics, she wasn’t even five feet tall and she had a pixie-like look to her. “The magic is in the makeup,” I told her. “It’s taken me from crazy Cat to reliable Caitlyn.”
“If I wear makeup I look like a middle school hooker. Or a kid who got into her mom’s makeup.” She didn’t sound particularly upset though. “I’m waiting for a massive growth spurt. I still think it will happen.”
“I’m sure it will. Drink your milk. It’s full of growth hormones.”
She laughed. “True. Okay, call me after you meet up with tall, dark, and disappearing.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re funny, you know that? Cute and funny. Love you, talk to you later.”
“Bye, Cat. Keep it off the streets.”
Tiffany could never say she loved me. It was her personal belief that if she said it to someone, they would disappear. Which, given what happened to me, should be my personal belief as well. But I was more optimistic that there was an explanation for everything. That people weren’t as selfish as they seemed to be.
I took a shower and checked my phone a hundred times. I didn’t want to be the one to contact Heath first. He should text me first to confirm our meeting. I didn’t
Learning to Kill: Stories