You Should Smile by Renee Lee Read Free Book Online Page B

the bar to hear the band play.  I didn’t want to stick around any longer, though.  I was ready to go home.  “I’m just gonna get a cab,” I said.
    Thad glanced at Chris.  “I’ll share it with her and make sure she gets home alright.”
    Chris looked back to me.  “Are you okay with that?”
    I hesitated.  Was I okay with that?  Ms. L was screaming, “Hell yeah!”  Meanwhile, my head was screaming, “Be careful, girlie!”  I tried to play it safe.  “Ummm, you don’t have to do that.  I can make it okay.”
    Thad shook his head.  “No.  Someone needs to make sure you get all the way home safely, Shay.  I offered.  If you’d rather it be someone else, that’s no problem, but this is non-negotiable.”  He stared at me intently.
    “Okay…..Ummm, you’re fine.”
    As soon as I said those particular words, I regretted them.  No one seemed to notice the double meaning except for me, of course, because all I seemed to think about lately was exactly how “fine” he was.  So before anyone could catch it, I awkwardly announced, “I need to use the restroom first.  I’ll be right back.” Such a dork.  I nearly ran to the bathroom.
    I texted Melissa from the bathroom to tell her I was just getting a cab.  As I got to the bathroom door to leave, I heard the unmistakable sound of Chris’ controlled voice in the hallway.  I guessed they’d gone to the restroom, too. 
    “Be careful, man.  Don’t do something you’ll both regret.”
    The walls were apparently much thinner than people realized.  I stayed behind the door, listening. 
    What?  Don’t judge.  You would, too. 
    “I’m good.  I just want to make sure she gets home safely,” Thad responded.
    “Look, you can tell yourself that’s all it is, but I saw you two in there.  Sparks were flying all over the place.  You’re a fucking fireworks show.”
    I could hear Thad sigh.  “That’s what I was trying to tell you guys earlier today.  It’s always like that…torture…like that dress she’s wearing tonight….fuck.…”
    Chris laughed.  “No doubt……Look, man, if it’s worth going after, then go after it.  Why don’t you just tell them you can’t be on her committee?”
    “I just can’t, okay?  First off, she has a fucking boyfriend.  Also, my research fits her project.  Long story, but I basically have to be on it.  Plus, you know me.  I’d fuck her and then that’s it and then what?  I’m not on her committee and she’s fucked over?  What good does that do anyone?”
    “I think you just answered that question then.  Be smart.”
    “I will.  Don’t worry, man.”
    I waited until I heard them walk off before I made my way out.
    His words kept ringing in my ears.  He thought I was still dating Decent Pete?  I tried to think back and realized that I’d never said otherwise.  Why would I have?  Worse, I’d apparently be just another “fuck” to him.  I didn’t know whether I should be “grateful” or not that he’d decided not to fuck me so that I don’t get screwed over by him and his lack of presence on my committee.  How kind of him.  Ms. L. was really, really pissy and sarcastic now. 
    I was ready to ask Chris to ride with me instead, but when I came out of the bathroom, there he was – just him, hands in the pockets of his frayed jeans, t-shirt taut across his chiseled chest, waiting for me.
    Our eyes met and he smiled.  This was the old smile, the Pickup Grinner smile that I loved so much.  I couldn’t help but smile back, even though I was still pretty pissed.
    I was quiet on the cab ride home. 
    Thad finally broke the silence. “Shay, I’m sorry I got carried away in there. I know I probably pissed you off.  I shouldn’t have done that…..I just…..”
    I was getting so tired of being cast as the poor innocent naïf.  “This is hard for me, too, you know,” I countered.
    He met my eyes and lifted his eyebrows, waiting on me to elaborate.
    Then it