and dining room in that case?’asks Eva. I think she is genuinely curious rather than just insolent; besides, as I interviewed twenty-two nannies to fill this position I don’t want to pick a fight at this early stage, so I give her the benefit of the doubt.
‘Peter and I need to keep abreast of the markets. The TVs are used for news channels exclusively.’
In fact I allow Auriol to watch rather a lot of TV at the weekends, but I don’t pay a nanny three pounds per hour over the going rate to allow her the same privilege.
‘NOT TRUE,’shouts Auriol.
Eva and I both pretend not to hear her and Eva switches off the TV. Auriol bursts into tears and splutters a chorus of ‘not fairs’. Eva says she’s tired, Auriol that is, and takes her upstairs for a bath.
When they return forty-five minutes later to say their goodnights, Auriol is looking much calmer and prettier. She’s wearing powder-blue pyjamas from Mini Boden. She looks cute enough to eat. She could be a child model, only I object strongly to the entire premise. I doubt I look quite so angelic. I have a cigarette in one hand and a glass of champagne in the other.
‘You shouldn’t smoke,’says Auriol. ‘You’ll die and before that you’ll look old and ugly.’
‘Do as I say, not as I do, Auriol,’I instruct.
I shouldn’t smoke and I usually try not to in front of Auriol. But besides finding it quite relaxing, I’m a sexy smoker. I keep my finger at an angle and men often comment on how elegant my hands are. When I take a drag, my lips double in size, whereas other people’s lips disappear. It’s a tough habit to kick when it’s so alluring.
‘Rose says you shouldn’t drink either. She says you’ll come to a nasty end.’
Auriol repeats the sentence in a tone which suggests she has little understanding of the expression.
‘That’s just her wishful thinking,’I mutter as I stub out the cigarette and slug back the champagne. I really must have a word with Peter. I do my utmost to minimize Auriol’s contact with Rose but of course chance encounters do happen. When has she had the opportunity to indoctrinate my daughter with her puritanical thinking? The last thing I need is Auriol joining the thought police. I want my child to be hip and relaxed.
‘Come and kiss me goodnight.’
Auriol bobs under my arm and I can smell her clean hair. Unexpectedly I get a lump in my throat.
‘Will you read to me?’she asks.
‘Only if I get to choose the story,’I reply.
She laughs and I take her to bed, generously telling Eva that she can go home ten minutes early. It pays to keep the staff happy.
5
Sunday 10 September
Rose
It’s a wet Sunday; thank God the boys are with me because I really struggle to fill wet Sundays without them. I rang Peter this morning and told him that they were too tired, after starting back at school, to play football or even visit him today.
‘Bloody hell, Rose, they haven’t just started reception class. A school term isn’t new to them. I thought you said it was a good thing to sign them up to the boys’under-eights football on a Sunday morning. You agreed to it.’
‘They’re mooching round the house, they’re quite pale with exhaustion,’I argued.
‘They’re bored. They need fresh air and a bit of horseplay. You mollycoddle them, Rose.’
A few tense and silent minutes pass until Peter accepts that I’m resolute. He sighs.
‘Well, what will they be doing instead?’
‘They won’t be bored; Daisy, Simon, Connie, Luke and the children are coming over for lunch.’
I’m small-minded enough to take great pleasure fromdelivering this choice piece of news. I wonder if Peter ever hankers after the splendid Sunday lunches that I prepared when we were together. The guests have remained the same, my cooking has got even better, the only thing missing is him. Not that I miss him. Well, at least, not always.
Connie and Luke met one another at my wedding. Luke was an usher; he’s been a friend of
Jo Willow, Sharon Gurley-Headley