Zorgamazoo by Robert Paul Weston Read Free Book Online

we’ll have to be brave.
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    They’re stalactites, you see, that’s what they’re called.
But these, it would seem, have been badly installed.
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    It says here they’re hung with such delicate poise
that they’ll fall in response to the tiniest noise!
So be very quiet. Don’t hurry or rush.
We’re about to go into…
the Tunnel of Hush.”
The inside of the passage was muffled and dull.
It was filled with an ancient, luxurious lull,
in which you heard nothing—not even your breath;
for the Tunnel of Hush was as silent as death.
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    Stepping into the tunnel, they tiptoed ahead.
Morty looked upward with shudders of dread.
Stalactites were hung from the ceiling above,
like the fingers and thumbs of some terrible glove.
    Morty was scared. He was looking around,
but up at the ceiling, and not at the ground;
and there, in the dust, just ahead of his boots,
lay a raggedy bramble of creepers and roots.
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    So Morty, of course, was hardly prepared
when his foot was entangled, his boot was ensnared.
To his credit, mind you, he said nothing at all.
He just fluttered his arms as he started to fall.
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    He went tumbling, in fact, right smack on his rump,
and the action produced a most audible…

    At first, there was nothing, no tumble of rocks,
no plummeting mountain of boulders and blocks.
    But then came a noise. Just the tiniest sound:
the
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plink
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of pebble that fell to the ground.

    cried Katrina. “Get up, and let’s go!
It’s the whole of the roof! It’s ready to blow!”
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    Morty looked up and thought, What have I done?!
Katrina was right. The barrage had begun!
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    Stalactites were falling, like bombs in a war,
skewers of granite and marble and more;
as Katrina and Morty both hurried ahead,
the boulders cascaded wherever they tread.
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    Like swords, or like sinister sabers of stone,
like jagged and tapering splinters of bone,
they fell to the floor with smashes and bangs,
like a venomous shower of vampire fangs!
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    â€œQuick,” cried Katrina, “just a little bit more!
It’s there, up ahead! The exit! The door!”
Each of them saw it, a pocket of light,
a patch of the sky that was blindingly bright;
which now, in their moment of peril and strife,
quite suitably glowed like the promise of life.
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    Meanwhile, the passage was falling to bits!
A shattering, clattering, battering blitz!
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    It was then that they made their respective escapes,
but not without bruises and scratches and scrapes.
They dove from the tunnel and onto a hill,
going head over heels, in a dizzying spill.
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    They rolled down the slope and muddied their pants,
and stopped in a thicket of bushes and plants,
where Morty said, “Well, I guess we’ve arrived,
and Katrina, guess what? I think we survived!”
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    Katrina, mind you, was a little bit peeved.
She didn’t seem happy, or even relieved.
“Morty, you oaf! You lumbering lout!
We’re lucky,” she cried, “that we even got out!
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    You’re klutzy! You’re clumsy! You’re not very deft!
You might have two feet, but they’re both of them left!
And speaking of which, it’s because of those feet,
that we nearly were mashed into hamburger meat!”
    Morty lay still, saying nothing at all.
He remained on his back, laid out in a sprawl.
“I’m sorry,” he said, with gasping fatigue,
“This adventuring stuff—it’s out of my league.”
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    Katrina just scoffed. She was wondering why,
the zorgles would choose such a blundering guy
to go on a quest, with so much at stake.
To Katrina, it seemed like a dreadful mistake.
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    Thinking these thoughts, she started to stand.
She took a look round, at the lay of the land.
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    The view left her breathless, unable to speak.
They were high on the ridge