A Consumer's Guide to Male Hustlers by Joseph Itiel Read Free Book Online

activities.
    Jed came back to the hotel. He was dripping water on the floor. "Let's go to the hot tub. I feel chilled," he said.
    Other guests had the same idea. It was crowded in and around the tub. Lots of guys made passes at Jed. Once we returned to the room Jed grabbed me and threw me on the bed. We had sex for the second time that evening, and it was even better than the first time.
    Jed never discussed his sexual tastes with me. I suspect that his on-and-off roommate was, at least for a while, his lover. The roommate, an unemployed graphic artist, lived on disability income. He was a plain-looking man a few years older than Jed. He had seen me often enough when I came by to pick Jed up, and was always friendly to me. Jed never told me anything about lovers, clients, or tricks. I knew that, from time to time, when he was short on funds, he would hustle.
    Jed knew that I was unconditionally opposed to drugs. He never bothered to discuss, in depth, his drug habit. I do not know whether Jed did drugs so heavily because he had mental problems, or whether he had mental problems because of all the drugs he took. 2
    2. There seems to be a nexus between drugs and hustling. This is not a new phenomenon. For instance, a book published in Germany in 1926, describing the Berlin hustler scene, also mentions the use of cocaine among hustlers. The Hustler , John Henry Mackay, translated by Hubert Kennedy (Boston: Alyson Publications, 1985).
     
    * * *
     
    In the winter of 1985 Jed called me to arrange a time to install a new faucet in my kitchen. I had all but forgotten that he had promised to do this a few months earlier.
    When he finished the work he said, "I am giving up hustling."
    "Why?"
    "I am seeing a psychotherapist now. She says that being a sex object is fucking with my mind."
    I was shocked. "But, Jed, you are not a sex object!"
    "What am I then?"
    "A great sex maestro."
    I could tell he was pleased with my spontaneous reply. I wondered then how he had found the resources to see a therapist. Maybe, I thought, pushing thirty was driving him to make changes in his life.
    "I wish you a happy retirement, Jed," I said, "but I will miss you very much."
    I felt very saddened to lose Jed. I did not believe that hustling was why Jed was so mixed up. But once the therapist told him this he would have made this association whenever we had sex. It would not have worked for either of us.
    As uncommunicative as ever, Jed had no parting words for me.
     
    * * *
     
    I did not see or hear from him for two years. Then I ran into him in the street. He looked gaunt and his face was pinched. Still, to me he was just as attractive as he had always been. In answer to my question he said, "I am going to school now. I am taking up graphic design."
    Years earlier Jed had shown me some of his drawings. I liked them. There seemed no reason why he would not make a good graphic designer.
    I wondered whether Jed had AIDS. This would explain his seeing a therapist and his ability to go to school. He was probably receiving SSI. I was not worried about myself. I had been tested a few months earlier for the first time and was negative. Jed and I had had sex before we knew about AIDS. But whatever we did, first unsafely and later on taking precautions, Jed had never penetrated me. Not having been penetrated by anybody is the only explanation I have about why I have survived while so many others, who led the same lifestyle, perished.
    It took yet another year for me to bump into Jed again. By then it was obvious that he had AIDS. We chatted for a while. "Call me sometime, Jed," I said as we parted.
    "I may surprise you one of these days," he said.
    A while later, I found out that a new acquaintance knew Jed well. "You know, don't you, that Jed is very sick," said the acquaintance. "He'll probably die soon."
    "No, I did not know that. Please give him my regards. I would like to visit him. Would you find out whether he would want to see me?"
    A few days later my