Ache for You (Trapped in Three Hill Book 1) by Nancy Beaudet Read Free Book Online Page A

There was no escape with Mal.
                  “I love you, Mal. I have always loved you. I fell in love with you when I was 12 years old. You were so cool and strong and built and I loved you. I could not even comprehend how much I loved you. The intensity of it made me ill. I couldn’t go to school; I didn’t want too. I didn’t want to see you, I couldn’t look at pictures of you and I couldn’t hear about you. I couldn’t listen to you or be in the same room with you without wanting to kill myself.”
                  This is the ugly truth.
                  “Loving you made me hate you, it made me hate myself. Falling in love with you made me mean and it made me cruel. I stopped being merciful with people who had never deserved evil.” I stand in front of Mal, if he could see me right now, or feel me at all, we would be nose to nose.
                  I stand on my tip toes.
                  “I love you, you stupid, selfish, brain-dead, douche canoe. I one-hundred-percent unequivocally love you. There is only one thing in this world that I still know to be true and that’s that I can’t live without you. I won’t, it’s just not fucking possible. It would be cruel.”
                  Would it though?
                  I deserve this hell. I resist the urge to slap Mal. This is not his fault.
                  “What’s going on with you? Why are you so intent on being the biggest asshole possible?” I stop, looking down. “Sorry, that was a little rude.” I amend myself, watching as Mal circles the room. He’s searching for something invisible.
                  “I don’t know why I’m apologizing. It’s not like you can hear me anyhow. Hey wait, what are you doing to your cell phone? That was the last good picture of us —NO! DON’T THROW IT AT THE WALL!”
                  Pieces of plastic and glass hit the ground. It’s broken and useless now.
                  “Oh I am so going to kill you.”

   Can You Hear Me Now ?- Mal
     
                  I toss my phone at the wall. I can’t stand my ringtone. Did you forget that it was just a recording of you?
                  Saying hello? You were doing this stupid impression of that dirty parrot that they used to show off downtown. Hello? Hello? How do you do? Can I help you? Hello? Baby wants to kiss you.
                  I hate the sound now.
                  I hate the memory of your voice because I know that my memory wouldn’t do you right at all. I hate thinking about you or seeing you and yet I live for those nightmares that leave me screaming at my bedroom walls. I hate you and I miss you. I love you. I don’t know how to do both.
                  “I am so going to kill you!” someone echoes. For a brief second it sounds like you Pretty Girl but we all know that that isn’t possible, my townhouse is tightly closed. I don’t trust my neighbours enough to leave my windows open when I’m not home, but we both know that the walls are far from soundproof.
                  It could have been anyone.
                  Perhaps that Sawyer girl next door finally kicked her loser boyfriend out the front door. If so, I should make popcorn and go sit on my porch. Yes, I am that kind of neighbour. There are girls all over Three Hill, I’ve kissed half of them but I failed to tell any of them the truth. I know now that none of them are you, and none of them will ever look at me like you do. Did, not do. I hate having to remind myself of the fact that you’re not coming home. Like ever, at all. I don’t want to blame you, but right now I will. You should have let me save you.
                  I knew how to save you; you know?

   What the Hell is Wrong with You ?- Flo
     
                  “Did you know how to save me?