is behind me and that I only want friendship for now, that ’ s all. As it starts raining outside, I hear the door and a few seconds later Jacob strolls into the living room.
“ Hey, morons, ” he chimes, putting his training bag on the floor.
“ Hey, loser, want a puff? ” asks Jhonny, who is suddenly awake but stoned as hell. I need to play it cool with Jacob. He hasn ’ t been at home much lately, and he is the only person that has any information about India. Real fucking information, not rumours.
“ No, I ’ m off this shit, man. I ’ m off to the cinema and I need to get a shower, ” he states, giving me a nod.
Jhonny mutters something under his breath about appreciation. For a split second I feel like I need to run after him and ask him about his plans, but I choose not to, because a new idea starts to form in my chest.
“ Hey, man, what are you going to see? ” Malcolm shouts after him.
“ Watchmen , ” Jacob shouts back.
I smile to myself, thinking that Jacob just gave me the perfect opportunity to talk to India without any witnesses . An hour later when he leaves, I run upstairs to my laptop and search the show times. Dora hates films like that, but India would watch anything, and I bet that Jacob is going out with her. I miss seeing her, touching her, and now I finally would probably have the chance to talk to her, to apologise if she ’ ll let me. I know that my apology doesn ’ t mean much right now. India has to see that I ’ ve grown, that I get what she went through, and only friendship will seal us back together.
I leave the house half an hour later. There is a tension in my neck and my stomach churns thinking about the gamble I ’ m trying to pull off. There is only one cinema in Braxton and the film doesn ’ t start until late. Twenty minutes later I walk in and get the ticket to another film that starts at the same time as Watchmen . I have a feeling in my gut that India, Dora, and Jacob are going to show up in a few minutes. At the end of the day, I have to find a nice, quiet spot and wait. I ’ ve known India for years and it ’ s always the same with her. She drinks a lot, and almost every time she has to use the toilet. If I can speak to her alone, maybe she will at least listen to me.
I hide by the vending machines, watching people coming in and out. Ten minutes before the film is about to begin, I start to doubt my perfect plan because not one of them shows up. My blood heats up, making me feel like the last loser, but then I spot her emerging from the crowd. She looks fucking beautiful, but something inside me cringes when I see her holding hands with Evans. She looks radiant, probably because she knows that I won ’ t be around. I clench my fists, cutting the circulation in my hands.
It kills me that he is there, pretending that she belongs to him now. India ’ s eyes dart around and for a moment I wonder if she is thinking about me at all. You can ’ t just stop loving someone like that, after just a day. Although there is a really thin line between love and hate, and I proved to everyone that I could be a cruel motherfucker.
Chapter Six
Not enough.
Present
They all vanish inside the appropriate theatre and I have to just wait by the food section and keep watching the door. It doesn ’ t matter that the film is a couple of hours long. Before the film ends, she will head to the ladies ’ room. In most social situations I ’ m cool, nothing fazes me, but right now I feel like my head is going to explode. My dick is hard and that ’ s only because I saw her and remember the way I touched her. I held back with the sex to make it more special. Now I have to dream about our conversation.
The guy by the food station stares at me, probably expecting me to order something. I don ’ t want to look like a total idiot, so I do. Some shitty hotdog and fries. People come and go and I stand there staring intensely at the door. I shove my sweaty palms into my