All of Me by Kim Noble Read Free Book Online Page A

throat. Arguments replaced all conversation. Mum loved Dad but I don’t think she ever got over his betrayal. Despite Dad’s best efforts, she couldn’t find it in herself to wipe the slate clean. He couldn’t leave the house without being accused of having another affair.
    ‘I know where you’re going, Jim Noble!’
    Of course he always denied it. ‘Look, I won’t go out if that’s how you feel.’ But by then it was too late. The seed was sown, a row was brewing, and ten minutes later he’d be storming out again. We’d hear his car start up, heavy on the accelerator, then screech off up the road. And, in his defence, the more Mum accused him of everything under the sun, the more Dad started to go out to escape her nagging, which of course just gave her more ammunition.
    It was a poisonous atmosphere really.
    Mum really struggled to hold it together sometimes. I remember arguing with Lorraine in the lounge – business as usual as far as we were concerned – when there was this crash from the kitchen. Next, Mum flew past us and stomped up the stairs. When I looked in the kitchen I saw she’d been halfway through preparing dinner. Everything was strewn over the worktop. A few minutes later she appeared downstairs again clutching an overnight bag.
    ‘Satisfied?’ she said coldly.
    ‘What’s going on?’ I asked.
    ‘I’ve had enough. I’m going.’
    ‘Mum, don’t leave us!’ we both chorused together. But she wasn’t listening. She opened the front door and without even looking back, stepped out. I dived onto her coat to drag her back but she just smacked me away. Then the front door slammed shut behind her.
    ‘Where’s she going?’ I asked Lorraine.
    ‘Dunno,’ she said. ‘But it looks like she’s running away.’
    She came back a few hours later and refused to discuss it. But it happened quite a few times over the years. Usually, we discovered, she was just hiding next door. Who knows what our neighbour thought when Mum pitched up with a suitcase?
    Small things seemed to set Mum’s temper off. She wasn’t a passionate person and didn’t like to get involved in conversations on ‘big’ subjects. Every so often, though, she’d just explode. Once during a row with Dad she put her fist through a glass window. She literally just punched it, then stared at the blood pouring from her wrist. We rushed around getting bandages and sweeping glass and trying not to scream but it was terrifying.
    I suppose it all stemmed from her problems with Dad but Lorraine and I didn’t know that. It wasn’t in their nature to keep us informed of things. They’d never even officially told us that Dad had left. He was often out after I went to bed. Not seeing him in the evenings wasn’t out of the ordinary. In the end we pieced together bits and pieces. All we knew for sure was that the less time they spent in each other’s company, the better.
    There were other impacts on our lives. Mum announced one day we were going on holiday to Jersey. It became clear that Dad wouldn’t be going. I could look forward to a week without them tearing strips off each other. That will be nice.
    But it didn’t work out that way.
    We all got in the car for the short journey to the station. Dad got the luggage out of the boot and we all said goodbye. Then Dad climbed back into the driver’s seat and said, ‘Well, it’s just us two now.’
    I wasn’t going.
    I had no idea why I wasn’t invited. I think it was the school holidays so that wasn’t an issue. I just know I had to watch while Mum and Lorraine packed their bags, all excited like they were the sisters, and not me. The things they were going to do, the places they were going to see, the fun they were going to have.
    Without me.
    It got worse. Dad obviously had to work so to give Nan a break I was farmed out for the odd day to the usual babysitters. Some I liked, some I didn’t. I think these days families think twice about letting certain people look after their