All of Me by Kim Noble Read Free Book Online Page B

young ones. That wasn’t such a consideration back then. On the positive side I didn’t seem to be anywhere long. Sometimes I wouldn’t even remember going, just waking up and then being collected by Dad or Nan. Still, that was normal.
    Strangers though they were around the house, Mum and Dad did manage to put their differences aside when they needed to. When I was ten, we all went on a family holiday to Yugoslavia. I think this was quite unusual in 1971. Cheap foreign flights hadn’t really come in then but it must have been a package deal. I really can’t imagine why else we would have done it.
    For some reason Lorraine’s boyfriend, Bob, was allowed to come as well. He was quite young, with a skinhead haircut, but that actually helped him because the rest of us caught nits. All I remember of that holiday is scratching my head. But then so much of my childhood left me scratching my head …
    A five-year gap between sisters is fun when you’re young and great when you’re older. But for a few years in the middle it can be hellish. No fifteen-year-old wants her kid sister sniffing around. Lorraine preferred to spend her time with her boyfriend so the last thing she wanted was being shackled with me. Mum sometimes asked her to babysit me, especially on a Saturday when she liked to go out with friends for a drink. That always caused a fight.
    Sometimes Mum and Dad would go out for the night together or more usually they went out separately at the same time. Once or twice they even stayed away overnight. When Nan was around it didn’t matter. Everything changed when she was away. I remember Lorraine getting a finger pointed at her and made to promise not to have any parties.
    ‘Of course I won’t. I swear.’
    No sooner was the sound of Dad’s car out of range than there was a knock at the door – the first of many for the evening. Some of the faces I recognised, some I didn’t. They were all at least five years older than me, a lot of them skinheads like Bob. Most were a bit shocked at a kid like me being there.
    Lorraine tried to get me to go to my room but I refused.
    ‘I’m telling Mum and Dad if you make me.’
    ‘You wouldn’t dare!’
    ‘Want to find out?’
    I spent the rest of the night being given piggy-back rides up and down the garden by Lorraine’s boy friends. Anything to buy my silence.
    My sister must have thought she’d been so clever, even if she did have to give in to my blackmail. The next morning the house was spick and span and by the time Mum and Dad returned you’d never have guessed what had gone on.
    That was, until our next-door neighbour came round for a cup of tea and mentioned it to Mum. All hell broke loose then. Lorraine was grounded for a week and for once I got away scot-free – even though I’d spent the night at the party as well!
    All Lorraine wanted was to get married and move out. That finally happened when she was eighteen. She looked beautiful but I don’t remember the ceremony, just the dancing afterwards. My brother-in-law had started his police training at Hendon but didn’t finish it and had become a fireman. Lorraine always had a thing for men in uniform. I was happy for her, of course, but even more so because once she moved out I got her room. It didn’t matter if it was the smallest room in the house. It was my own space.
    With Lorraine gone, there was one person fewer to argue with. And now at least when Dad and Mum started their bickering I had a refuge. I remember leaving the table when they’d started shouting at each other.
    ‘Where do you think you’re going?’ Mum demanded.
    ‘To my room.’
    Not Nan’s room. Not my shared room. My room. You’ve no idea how good it felt to say that.
    Speaking of the table, I don’t remember many mealtimes. I didn’t have much of an interest in food, really. Or so I thought. Yet when I saw some pictures of me as a ten-year-old recently I couldn’t believe my size. From the age of seven I’d just seemed to