Always and Forever by Soraya Lane Read Free Book Online Page B

worth of stubble on his cheeks. “Son, she’s just trying to do her job.”
    “Leave me,” Matt said, his voice like venom, staring at his dad. “Leave me alone.”
    He turned his back, didn’t give a damn now whether anyone else was in the room or not, because he wasn’t leaving his mom like that. He sure as hell wasn’t going to let her be wheeled out like a nameless corpse, dressed in the ugly hospital gown. She had always looked beautiful, never left the house without make-up on and nice clothes, and he wasn’t going to let anyone else see her like this. It was the last thing he could do for her and he was going to damn well do it.
    Matt glanced behind him, saw they were alone again, and he touched her hand, then placed a palm to her cheek. He might be only seventeen, but he knew right from wrong, and this was wrong.
    “I’m so sorry, Mom,” he muttered. Her head was bare, her bald head almost grotesque it was so pale. And she was so, so thin. He hadn’t noticed it so much until now, just how bone thin she really was beneath her clothes.
    Matt dragged his eyes from her scalp and looked around for her bag. She never left home without it, and he doubted she would have gotten in the ambulance unless someone had brought it for her. He was right. It was sitting on the floor, kicked halfway under the hospital bed. He pulled it out and found her scarf; the softest silk and in a light pink color. Maybe that’s why he hadn’t noticed how sick she’d looked, because she’d always had her scarf tied around her head and make-up on her face, her trademark pink lipstick brightening her skin. He lifted the scarf and stared at it, tried to figure out what to do and had no damn clue. So he just folded it in half and placed it over her head, covering part of her forehead, then carefully lifting her head to tuck it under.
    He sucked back a sob as his fingertips connected with her skin. It felt too cold, not right. But Matt kept it together, did his best tying the scarf to the side slightly. At least she looked a little more like herself. Then he found her blanket, one made of soft wool that she’d always had folded in her large bag, slung across the top because she was always getting cold and needing it near. When she’d been to watch his football games, he’d always looked up and seen her with it tucked around her shoulders, but her big smile and even bigger wave had meant no one else probably had a clue how sick she was. Maybe not even him. It wasn’t until he’d received the call today, walked into the room and seen her lying on the bed, that it had really hit him. His mom’s cancer had been bad; he’d known that, but knowing hadn’t prepared him, not even close.
    Matt pulled her gown down her legs as far as he could, feeling weird touching her like that when it wasn’t something he’d ever usually do. Then he opened out the blanket and placed it over her, wanting to keep her warm even though he knew it was impossible. He even tucked her hands under it, knowing how cold they’d been the last couple of months. She was always calling him over to hold her hands, always telling him how warm he was and how she needed to steal a little bit of it before he left for the day.
    He wished he’d skipped school and just stayed home. If he’d known she wasn’t going to be around when he got home, he would have. Screw school. Screw football. Screw the whole fucking world.
    Matt bent down low over her, wished he knew what to do with make-up so he could have put some on her face, but that was way beyond him. Instead, he held her, let all his tears fall onto the blanket he’d just covered her in.
    “I love you, Mom,” he choked out. “I love you so much.”
    He wanted to believe she was watching him from somewhere, that maybe she hadn’t even left the room yet and was standing behind him, or drifting up above, before she passed over to wherever it was that dead people went.
    And then he stood up, pulled himself together