trying to look right through me. It’s unnerving. “Where is he?”
“Who?”
There’s that smug smile again. I’m usually the smartest person in the room wherever I go but when I’m with Nic, I feel like I’m playing a game of chess and he’s always two moves ahead of me.
“Your boyfriend.”
I frown. “I don’t have a boyfriend.”
He laughs. “That’s what I thought.”
“I did have a boyfriend. For four years. All through college.”
“Where is he now?”
“Law school. On the East Coast. Harvard.”
I’m not sure why I feel the need to explain my past relationship to Nic. But I feel like he’s judging me.
“He didn’t take you with him when he left for Harvard?”
I shake my head.
“Why?”
“I don’t know.” And it’s the truth. Maybe I was naïve to think that Jackson would be willing to do a long distance thing but he never even suggested it. And he never asked me to go with him either.
“I hate to break this news to you, but you were nothing more than a long-term lay.”
I can feel my eyes practically pop out of my head I’m so shocked. But then the shock just as quickly turns to anger. “What?” I mumble even though I heard exactly what he said.
“Long. Term. Lay,” he repeats. “You’re a smart girl. I’m sure you can figure out what the term means.”
“We were in a committed four-year relationship.”
“Maybe that’s what you thought. Maybe that’s even what he told you. Or maybe that’s what you assumed. I just know if the guy is gone then there wasn’t much of a relationship. Long-term lay.”
M y chest tightens like all the air has been sucked out of my lungs. “But he said he loved me.”
As soon as the words leave my mouth I immediately regret them. I expect Nic to laugh. Or make some snarky remark, but to my surprise, he doesn’t.
“If he truly loved you. If he felt like you were his. If the two of you truly belonged to each other. He wouldn’t have left. Or he would have packed up all of your shit and taken you with him. It’s that simple.”
I feel like I’ve been slapped. “You don’t understand.”
“No, I don’t think you understand. If you were his, you wouldn’t be standing here talking to me right now You’d be living with him in a shitty law student apartment in Cambridge.”
T ears start streaming down my face but I make no effort to stop them. I feel kind of dead inside. Was I living a lie? For four years? Is it possible that I didn’t mean as much to Jackson as I thought I did? I have to admit that it hurt when he left and never asked me to go with him.
“Dude,” I hear Leo say as he strolls over to us. “You’ve got to deal with this shit.”
“What shit is that?” Nic asks.
Leo shakes his head. “I don’t know. Some creepy-as-shit reporter. Says he’s got some kind of scoop. Wants your statement.”
Nic points to me. “No, she’s got to deal with it. She’s our own personal journalist. She’s got the exclusive. She can deal with that shit.”
“Our own journalist,” Leo remarks. “It’s kind of like having our own personal Shakespeare.” He laughs at his own joke but no one else does.
Nic frowns. “Except that Shakespeare was a playwright not a reporter.”
“At least I knew he was a writer,” Leo fires back. “Give me some credit, Dude.”
Nic looks over at me. “Do you think you can handle this, Shakes?”
I try to discreetly wipe the stray tears from my cheeks. Not that an yone seems to care that I’ve been crying. “Is that really necessary?”
Nic feigns innocence. “Is what necessary?”
“That ridiculous nickname.”
He laughs. “You’ll have to blame Leo for that one. Or I could just call you Hippy Library Chick. Your call.”
“If those are my only options I’ll stick with Shakes.”
Nic nods. “I really like Shakes. It suits you.” He looks so self-satisfied it makes me want to scream. Then his expression changes and he looks more serious. “Are you sure you can