heart.
I roll out of bed and take a quick shower while Grace picks clothes for me to wear – a flowing skirt and tank top. I pull my jacket on and we stumble out of the apartment, laughing groggily. Grace looks completely different without makeup, but her skin glows and she’s got a little smile on her lips. The car waiting downstairs is a black Lexus with a serious-looking chauffeur. We sit in the backseat and Grace hands him a slip of paper.
“That address, please.”
He nods and we pull out of the lot. L.A is pitch dark – everything closed save for a few neon twenty-four-hour stores and clubs. Businessmen and women on their way to work stream in and out of coffee shops and the subway. The highway isn’t crowded.
“So, where do your parents live?” Grace asks.
“San Fran. They have their soap company up there.”
“Very cool.” Grace smiles. I stare out the window at the passing city. Mom’s tears and the bankruptcy papers are fresh in my mind. I didn’t call them last night – but I did say I might sleep over at Jen’s place, so hopefully they aren’t worried.
“You love them a lot, huh?” Grace asks. “Jen told me how hard you study at school to keep up the scholarship so they don’t have to pay much.”
I shrug nervously. “I don’t know if that’s love, really. I’m not helping them or contributing. Just staying afloat.”
“You will. Someday. You don’t have to do everything on your own, right now.”
“You are,” I say. Grace laughs.
“I got very lucky, and now I have a good career. But I’m selfish. I don’t give any of it to anyone.”
“You let Lee stay with you.”
“Lee helps with rent – he has his own money from before father gambled it all on the horses. I’m not really helping Lee.”
“You are,” I insist. She laughs and leans her head against the window.
“If the marriage between you two doesn’t work out, it’s only a matter of time before father drags him back to Madrid for good to take over the business. Lee won’t say no. He loves father, and cares a lot for family. He’ll sacrifice his freedom to make father happy.”
“You know about the will? And the marriage?”
Grace nods. “It’s all Father started talking about after Grandfather died; the chunk of change he’d get when Lee married you. The money that will save him from the loan sharks for good. Pathetic. I don’t blame you if you don’t do it – marriage isn’t the sort of thing a will should dictate. It should be love.”
Grace’s words are full of hard-earned wisdom. Is Lee living a free playboy life because he’ll know he’ll be shackled with a heavy, inevitable responsibility of his father’s business? The sad darkness I saw flicker behind his eyes every so often – could that be it?
By the time we get to Laguna Beach, the sun is high. The surfers are out, but not many people crowd the pale winter sands. Grace thanks the driver and we get out. She waves to a group of people under a pavilion. It has three canvas walls and is bigger up close – space enough for expensive camera equipment, the camera crew, a dressing room with screens for privacy, and a chair with a mirror for makeup artists. A long table is spread with clipboards, water bottles, and fruit and pastry platters. Plates of ham and cheese and fresh juice dispensers are at the end. Grace eats a few grapes and I wolf down a pastry.
A man in a button-up shirt and glasses hugs Grace and they kiss each other’s cheek. Grace greets the makeup artists and finally turns to introduce me. I put on my best pretend-not-to-be-nervous smile. Grace points to the glasses-man.
“Rose, this is Ferdinand, our mastermind for the shoot today and chief photographer. Ferdinand, this is Rose.”
“Hi,” I shake his hand. “The setup you have here is beautiful.”
“It’s an American beauty, the boardwalk.” His accent is thickly Spanish. “But we want to keep the color scheme chilly. Desolate. A little hopeless, you