As an Earl Desires by Lorraine Heath Read Free Book Online Page B

though you are upon a
stage, and I am in the audience. This nearness is preferable,
don’t you think?”
    â€œI think if you become lax, that you will
fall into bad habits.”
    â€œIt is a risk I think worth
taking.”
    â€œIf I am to educate you, I must educate you
on all matters.”
    â€œEducate me on this then. Mr. Spellman left
his documents on my desk, and I looked them over very carefully.
They provided descriptions of the items purchased. I was surprised
to discover how plain much of the clothing was.”
    She reached for her wineglass, her hand shaking.
She took a longer swallow than usual, before saying, “I have
occasion to wear plain clothing.”
    â€œAnd how do you explain the dolls?”
    â€œMy hobby. I collect them.”
    â€œI’ve never seen any here.”
    â€œI keep them in a room for my private
enjoyment.”
    He studied her, trying to determine why she seemed
so incredibly nervous, and what reason she could possibly have for
lying to him. “I thought the purpose of a collection was to
display it—”
    â€œThe purpose of a collection is simply
that—to collect.”
    â€œWhat are you afraid of?”
    â€œI’m not afraid of anything.”
    â€œEveryone is afraid of something.”
    â€œWhat of you then? What are you afraid
of?”
    â€œI’m afraid of never finding love, of
living alonely life, and at its end finding
myself with nothing except discontentment.”
    She looked at him as though she’d never seen
a sadder creature. “Do you not understand that you
shouldn’t reveal so much of yourself?”
    â€œIf I don’t, then how will anyone truly
come to know me? To trust me?”
    â€œWhy can you not be content to gaze upon the
surface?”
    â€œBecause it isn’t the surface that
draws me to you.”
    She came up out of the chair as though someone had
suddenly lit a fire beneath her. “I have no desire to discuss
so private a matter where servants can hear. You may join me in the
drawing room as soon as you’ve finished with your
dinner.”
    She swept from the room as though she were a woman
scorned. He hardly knew what to think, how to react. He was not a
stranger to women. On the contrary, he’d enjoyed the company
of his fair share over the years, had been left with the impression
that they’d enjoyed being with him as well. But then none of
them had been married to the old earl, and from what he’d
been able to ascertain from those who knew him, few had liked the
man.
    With a sigh, he shoved back his chair and stood.
Perhaps she thought all earls of Sachse were cut from the same
cloth.
    He walked out of the room, down the hall, and into
the drawing room. Standing before a window, she was gazing out into
the night. The firelight from the nearby hearth played over her
golden brown hair, the delicate slope of her neck, her narrow
shoulders. At moments like this he found it difficult to envision
her as the haughty woman she so often came across as being.
    â€œWould you prefer for me to leave your
home?” he asked.
    â€œIt is not my home.” She glanced over
her shoulder at him. “All of this is yours. Do not think for
a single moment that I forget that fact. I know it is only your
generosity and kindness that allows me to live in this house. You
may ask or demand of me what you will, and I have no choice except
to follow through on your wishes—until I have found another
husband to see after me.”
    â€œYou are not my slave, Camilla.”
    â€œBut you provide for me, do you not? The old
Sachse, may he rest in hell, made no provisions for me—as Mr.
Spellman was only too quick to remind you.”
    And perhaps that was a good deal of the problem. He
couldn’t imagine being in her situation when she never knew
from one day to the next if his generosity would be withdrawn. If
so, how would she live?
    As though sensing the direction