As I Breathe (One Breath at a Time: Book 2) by Leilani Bennett Read Free Book Online Page B

one particular voice seemed to care the most. This didn’t mean that I was under some misconception about the voices. After all it was abnormal to hear voices, but one thing I knew they were not otherworldly entities like ghosts. Otherwise, as a child I would’ve been scared to death of them—even an adult would’ve been afraid. Although I’d never actually seen a ghost, I knew who the boogeyman was, and I didn’t desire to come face to face with one. Besides, who in their right mind would want to talk to a ghost?
     
    ***
     
    Was hearing voices really so awful? I had to know why this was happening to me. Why did my mother consider it a curse? Under the circumstances, I couldn’t come out and ask her though. That would’ve made her freak out all over again. Trying to suppress the voices from the entire world, as my mother demanded, was no longer doing it for me either. I wanted to share my experiences about the voices with my close friends and family. It was too much to keep a secret.
    Months later, I decided to bite the bullet and speak to my grandmother about the voices. I had no one else I could talk to. She was my only hope. After all, she secretly read my cards, palms and horoscope—all things that my mother would disapprove of. Grandmother was so wrapped up in these strange things. She owned tons of books, mostly ones that had something to do with the supernatural world. I found them hidden under her bed and read them too. My favorite books were the horoscope books, reading my horoscope was a fun pastime.
    It turned out my grandmother was the one person who understood whom and what the voices were. The day I finally mustered up the courage to ask her about them she confirmed what I already figured—she communicated with them too. Just to be clear, she didn’t speak to the voices in my head, but she had her own voices, ones that spoke to her. The voices channeled messages through her, or at least, that was what she said. I had no reason to doubt her.
    Grandmother claimed that they were the voices of angels— guardian angels, precisely. We all have at least one angel watching over us she explained. I couldn’t help but wonder why the voices didn’t tell me this themselves? Nonetheless, I bought her theory.
    “ If you’re one of the lucky ones there’s an entire army of guardian angels guiding you.” And, she told me I was one of the lucky ones. As much as I thought this could be a good thing, it could be a very bad thing too. I couldn’t imagine having an arsenal of angels residing in my head, constantly whispering and directing my every move. Would I ever have a moment of privacy?
    My grandmother advised me to only listen to the voices and to avoid having conversations with them. She added if I ever chose to talk to them that I should keep it a secret from all adults and, really, even from my friends. This would inevitably include my parents. She didn’t have to explicitly inform me of that. Basically, she gave me some of the same old jargon my mother said but with a twist.
    Her advice came a little too late. I had been talking up a storm with the voices for years. My conversing with them had never done me any harm, so her advice left me more confused than ever. Although it really wasn’t complicated, it was simple. My grandmother didn’t want me to talk to them, even though this was contrary to what she did. I’m sure the conversation with my mother influenced her to give me such vague direction.
    Simply...do as I say not as I do...
    “Just listen to them—but if you do talk to them, don’t tell anyone,” were her final words regarding the angels.
    What? My head was spinning. I guess my guardian angels were spinning in my head too—if they were angels at all. One day I aimed to find out.
     
     
    -4-
    A Storm in My Head
     
    Eventually, the voices disappeared. All of them seemed to have vanished except for one of the three that I’d become aware of. Ironically, he was the loudest guardian