Awakening by Gillian Colbert, Elene Sallinger Read Free Book Online Page A

store’s brooding owner. At least, brooding where she was concerned. She’d noticed he only seemed to be that way with her. With everyone else he was friendly and solicitous, and with Bridget, he was downright affectionate.
    She didn’t take offence to it, really; after what had happened that first night, she figured she’d managed to disgust him royally, but she liked Bibliophile too much to give it up. She was spending a lot of time here, reading and hanging out, and he was reaping the benefits of her book addiction so she didn’t feel like she was imposing. But, if she were being completely honest, she felt self-conscious when he was around. His treatment of her made her feel like there was something wrong with her since he was so nice to everyone else. He wasn’t mean to her, he was scrupulously polite, but that was just it. He was relaxed and even joked with other customers, but with her he only spoke when it was absolutely necessary for him to do so. Other than that, he basically ignored her.
    ‘Hon?’ Bridget drew her attention back to their conversation. ‘Did you hear me?’
    Claire flushed brightly. ‘I’m sorry, Bridget. My mind wandered. What did you say?’
    ‘I asked you why you shy away from sharing anything remotely personal?’
    Claire stared down into her coffee, wondering how to respond to Bridget. She liked her too much to lie to her, but she wasn’t sure she was ready to face her rejection if she knew too much about her past. Bridget sat quietly, sipping her coffee, and just waited.
    Claire set her coffee down on the table and clasped her hands in her lap. Several times she took a deep breath to start speaking. Even went so far as to open her mouth. Each time, though, nothing came out. She probably looked like a beached fish. She clenched her hands tightly in her lap and took another deep breath …
    ‘I was raped.’
    ‘What!’ Claire spluttered as her own words died on her lips.
    ‘It happened when I was 22 and too trusting of the world for my own good,’ She gave Claire a sad, tight smile. It was the first time Claire had ever seen her look uncomfortable. ‘I was visiting a friend at his dorm in order to return the notes I’d borrowed. He’d warned me about coming to his dorm unescorted, but I hadn’t been able to reach him and figured I’d just slip them under his door. I was on my way out and one of his floor mates came out and started talking to me. I had seen him before and thought he was cute. He invited me into his room to talk –’ she put air quotes around “talk” ‘– and, well, he raped me.’ She leant over and picked her coffee back up. Claire saw the cup tremble just a little.
    ‘Why are you telling me this?’ she asked softly. She was stunned at Bridget’s revelation.
    ‘Because,’ Bridget put her cup back down and faced Claire, her tone softly brisk, ‘you need to understand that everyone has secret shames that they hide. Things in their past that they wish didn’t exist or they could redo, but those things don’t have to define us. Mine doesn’t and yours don’t have to.’
    Claire stared at Bridget for several long moments. Her clear, green eyes were warm and just a bit sad, but she saw only sincerity in them. Claire wanted to share with Bridget, share her shame. Maybe then she could work through it, but she was also afraid. Bridget was the first person she’d felt any connection to since she was a child. And, Claire realised in that moment, Bridget’s opinion mattered to her.
    It wasn’t often that Claire met someone she felt she could respect. Bridget had proven to be everything she said she was and Claire was almost in awe of her. She was so open and affectionate. And now, knowing how she’d been violated, that feeling of awed admiration only deepened. This, of course, meant Claire was even more intimidated by her.
    This is it, Claire. Your first real test. Are you going to live or continue to die a little every day?
    Claire picked her