Belonging by Nancy Thayer Read Free Book Online

she didn’t have time for self-pity or regret—she was busy working at what she loved best with the man she loved. The truth was that Carter was with her more hours of the week than absent. His weekends in Westchester with his family gave her time to lunch with her friends or catch up on her sleep or shopping.
    Tory, her best friend, constantly advised Joanna to make a clean break with Carter and find someone else, an unmarried man. But Joanna had no illusions about that. She knew that interesting available men were rare, and furthermore, as she’d ascended in the world of television until she had found her niche here in the starry pinnacle, she understood that more and more men were becoming off limits to her, or would think they were, because she was so successful, and slightly famous, and even a little respected, as well as financially independent. The problem of time also entered in: she lived for her work; few men would be able to accommodate a woman with so little free time or emotional energy.
    What she knew of Blair also encouraged Joanna to believe that what she had with Carter was real love, complete and significant, while it was only the facade he shared with Blair. Joanna had met Blair at occasional network parties over the years. She’d been impressed. Blair was beautiful, small-boned, her heart-shaped face framed by a bell of glossy chestnut hair. She moved slowly, as if to an inner music. She was so serene. Joanna could understand how Blair provided the perfect refuge for a man like Carter,who spent most of his life in a network scramble of hurry, hassles, arguments, split-second expensive decisions, noise, furor, disasters, personalities, intrigue. In a perverse way it pleased Joanna that Blair was so lovely; Joanna liked competition and would always prefer to compete with a worthy adversary.
    Another source of gratification and even, she’d admit, of a petty pleasure was the fact that Joanna would never in a million years have shown Blair Amberson’s residence on Fabulous Homes .
    The summer after Joanna and Carter became lovers, she had the opportunity to see the Ambersons’ home in Westchester when they held a posh lawn party for the network. Joanna had gone with Tory and Tory’s husband, John, a network lawyer. The day had been perfectly sunny, and the French doors were open from the house to the garden where an enormous blue-and-white-striped tent had been set up. Tables of drinks and delicacies were set up around the turquoise swimming pool, on the lawn, as well as throughout the house. With a flute of Mumm’s in hand, Joanna wandered around, smiling, chatting, and secretly observing with an eagle eye.
    The style of the house—French provincial—was not Joanna’s favorite. However, the pristine atmosphere was impressive. Each room, like Blair herself, was beautiful, perfect in its proportions, and unutterably calm. No clutter. No frills. No fuss.
    That day she’d even seen the bedroom where her lover slept with his wife.
    People drifted in and out, upstairs and down, to look at the beautiful house. Joanna decided she needed to use the lavatory on the second floor, and then she walked down the spacious hall and stood just outside the master bedroom, looking in.
    She would have gone through Blair’s closet and drawers if she could have, but of course she didn’t dare, not with all the people coming and going. But where was it? she wondered, the clue, the key, to Blair’s soul? The house, master bedroom included, was as tidy and impersonal as a television ad. Luxurious, yes, but bland. Even sterile.
    “What you see is what you get.” A voice came from over her shoulder.
    “Tory! You startled me.”
    “I thought I’d find you up here snooping around.” She sauntered into the room.
    “I’m not snooping. I had to use the bathroom and I just passed—”
    “I’ve told you, and you wouldn’t believe me. Believe me now? Blair’s as deep as lipstick.”
    “She must have something more.