Beyond Tuesday Morning by Karen Kingsbury Read Free Book Online

walls. “I would never stop crying.”
    This time Jamie's smile was sad but easy. “I come because God gives me the strength.”
    “God let the towers fall.” Her answer was quick, sharp.
    “No, Sami.” Jamie took the girl's hands in her own. “God is good. He has nothing to do with evil.”
    Fresh tears filled the girl's eyes and spilled onto her cheeks. She looked at the picture of her father again. “But He could've stopped it.”
    “There are some things we won't ever fully understand this side of heaven.” Jamie squeezed the girl's hands. “What happened September 11 is one of them. But I know this …” Jamie's voice lowered. She waited until Sami was looking at her. “I couldn't have survived it without faith in God. Faith that I found after my husband died, even though he prayed for me to find it every day while he was alive.”
    Sami's eyes widened. “So you didn't always believe?”
    “No.” Jamie released the girl's hands and leaned her shoulder against the hard back of the pew. “My parents died in a car accident when I was about your age. I stopped believing in God that day and didn't talk to Him again until three years ago.”
    The girl shifted and set the photo on her knee. She ran her fingers beneath her eyes. “We were very close.” She looked at Jamie and stifled another sob. “My mom's a wonderful person, but my daddy knew me best.” Her gaze fell to the picture again. “I miss him so much.”
    “Tell me something, Sami.”
    She looked up. “What?”
    “Would your dad want you angry at God?” It was more than she would usually say, but that didn't matter. It was what Jake would've said. And since she did this in his honor, she would gently prod and push people back toward God as often as she had a chance.
    The girl picked up the photo and held it tight against her chest. She hung her head and uttered a gut-wrenching whisper. “No.”
    “If your father loved God, then he's in heaven now. Probably grateful that you wound up here today.”
    Sami nodded. “I think I've missed God almost as much as I missed my dad. I had to … had to work at being mad at Him.”
    “I know.” And she did. Jamie remembered a conversation she'd had with Jake not long before he died. He'd found out that she'd been asking Sierra about Sunday school. He wanted to know if maybe she'd changed her mind, if maybe she wanted to come one Sunday just to see what it was like. Just to find out if she still wanted to hold a grudge against God.
    At the time she'd had to work to tell him no. It was her pride, really. The fact that she didn't want to need God, didn't want to love Him. But it wasn't that she didn't believe. No matter what she told herself about God not existing and about the Bible being made up of fine-sounding fairy tales, she always knew the truth. God was alive and waiting for her. Hounding her relentlessly until finally He used Jake's Bible and journal to catch her, to break down the walls and allow her the chance to run to His arms.
    “It's just …” Sami lowered the photo so she could see it again. “I want to be with him on his birthday. And when I get married one day, I want him to walk down the aisle with me. I want it so bad.”
    “But you can't blame God that you won't have it, okay, Sami? God loves you very much. He loves your dad too.” Jamie took the girl's hands again. “Let's pray, okay?”
    “Okay.”
    They bowed their heads and Jamie prayed. “Suffering is a part of life, God. You showed us that on September 11. We almost never understand why.” She hesitated, trying to keep her composure. “But we know this: You love us. You loved us so much You gave us Jesus. And no matter how much Sami's suffering right now, You're here holding her, speaking peace into her heart and soul.” A Scripture came to mind. “Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that You know the plans You have for us. Help Sami remember that, God. Give her Your hope as she leaves this place, Your certainty that You