Flannery made himself busy, dusting the pews and generally moving about as she lit a candle and then settled herself down for a quick prayer, asking the Lord for forgiveness. She had to do this. She needed the money.
If she wanted to be completely honest with herself, she was looking forward to the challenge.
V
Danni didn’t tell anyone. She didn’t dare. The bastard had taken all of the evidence from her purse and carefully slipped it into an evidence bag. Then he’d sealed the bag in front of her and meticulously written on the date.
“No one has to see this, ever, Danielle. We made a deal, and I intend to keep it. But you’d do well to keep your end of the bargain. Do we understand each other?” He’d tried to sound all calm and authoritative, but he’d failed. He’d been gloating.
He hadn’t exactly raped her. It had been consensual, mostly, but he’d been gloating, savoring her discomfort, and she knew in her heart that, for him, half the fun had been knowing she didn’t enjoy herself. It was a power trip, just like they always said rape was.
Either way it was a violation, and she hated him for it. She was just glad he’d used condoms, because the idea of any part of him near her or in her was enough to make her want to cry again. And just as soon as she thought it, the notion became reality and the damned tears started all over.
It was Ben that finally got her to talk.
Ben Kirby was a quiet, sweet, funny boy who always made her feel better when she was down. He wasn’t a lover and had never tried to even date her, but he was a friend when she needed one.
And God, she needed one so badly.
Ben always seemed to know when to come by, when to crack one of his stupid little jokes, or even when to just offer a shoulder to lean on. He’d found her out in the park behind the university, sitting on a bench, and doing her best not to fall apart again. Several birds were in the area, all of them whoring for pieces of bread. She didn’t have any, but Ben did. He sat down next to her on the bench and said nothing for at least five minutes. He just tore off little pieces of white bread and threw them to the gathering crowd of pigeons, seagulls, and crows. After a few minutes he started giving some of the birds nicknames, pointing them out to her as they pulled different stunts, making up gossip about the lives of the damned birds and making her laugh.
It was silly and it was futile, and she laughed just the same, enjoying every second of the show until he ran out of bread.
When the birds had finally taken a hint and gone off to seek new people with more treats, Ben looked her in the eyes and smiled sadly. He almost always smiled that way, like there was something missing from his life and he knew what it was but could do nothing at all about it.
“Want to tell me what happened?”
“I can’t, Ben.”
He nodded. “Okay. That’s cool.” He patted his shoulder and gave her a puppy-dog expression that was so over-the-top pathetic that she laughed again, and then settled her head on the offered shoulder.
They sat that way for almost half an hour, until she was sure his arm must have fallen asleep. “I won’t judge you, Danni. You know that, right?”
“Yeah,” she sniffed and nodded against his Winslow Harper University sweatshirt. “Yeah, I know. It’s just. I did something stupid.”
“Did you hurt anyone?” It was a simple enough question. She shook her head.
“Then it couldn’t have been too stupid.”
“Well, it was up there.”
“Look, just don’t . . . don’t be too hard on yourself. If it was something you did, don’t do it again, and if it was something someone else did to you, you can always call the cops.”
The last part was meant as a joke, of course. She knew that because he always said it when he was cheering her up. But she broke down right then and there, and the next thing she knew he was holding her against him, rocking her like a baby. She told him