Cabin Glow: A New Adult and College Romance (The Billionaire Romance Redemption Series Book 3) by Bella Love-Wins Read Free Book Online Page A

conceive of the pain those dreams produced. He briefly considered seeing a therapist again. Now that some time had passed. He would be around Abby a lot; he could try again. It was a much better proposition, to deal with it proactively instead of forcing some of the grief on to Abby. She didn’t need it, she didn’t deserve it, and she had her own problems to bear, as far as he was concerned.
    He got up and went to the bathroom. Abby was still asleep when he came back. He crawled in to bed on his side, kissed her forehead, and settled in. They both had things to do the next day, so he did not disturb her restful sleep. He lay on his back with his arms folded under his head. He looked up at the ceiling. He wasn’t tired enough. He tried to relax, willing himself to not have a nightmare while Abby slept in his bed.
    It was sure to become one of those self-fulfilling prophecies. Whenever he wished so hard for the nightmares not to come, that was exactly when they would. He decided if he had to, he would stay up the rest of the night. His mind drifted to one of the more difficult memories. Like most people who’ve been to trauma, there was a part of the mind that seemed to block out some of the worst elements of the trauma, simply to protect the person from truly reliving the experience. It was no different for him.
    No matter what point the dream started at, it would always end the same way, and it would always block out the most violent milliseconds. It would end where his attention shifted from bewilderment over his bleeding, near-severed arm. The reel of his mind would seem to race forward to where he was screaming, demanding that the paramedic help Emma and the other driver, instead of him.
    My arm can wait! I don’t need an arm! Save her! Do something about Emma! He would shout at the paramedic. But in his dream, it always felt as though they couldn’t hear him, like he had lost his voice. They only attended to him, as though Emma and the other driver were invisible. And he would wake up screaming her name as he saw the life drain out of her.
    Sometimes, the dream would be his complete fixation on the blood as it dripped out of his arm, and the dangling flesh that hung below his elbow. That crimson pool that spread out on the ice beneath his feet; it would leave him dazed and paralyzed. Thinking back to the actual event, he had been mesmerized by his arm for way too long. As far as he was concerned, that loss of time was what caused two fatalities that night.
    This is why he didn’t care when the outside world wanted to place the blame squarely on his shoulders. In fact, he went along with it. He believed them; he agreed with them. It was all his fault, and that was something that he would never be able to shirk. No therapy could be that good, to make him feel it was an accident and his shock was legitimate. His state of shock after that accident killed two people. He would never stop blaming himself for it.
    He got out of bed and threw a robe on before heading to the kitchen for something to drink. He was so angry at himself. Why? He asked inwardly again. He could drop to his knees with his fists to the heavens right there in the kitchen. He could swear and hit something too, except Abby was in the next room. He had to pull it together for her. After his drink, he walked to the guest room at the other end of his hotel suite. He was sure the nightmares would come. After letting this wayward line of thinking go rampant for so long tonight, there was no way he was going to have one beside Abby.

Chapter Seven
    ANDREW woke up at the crack of dawn. He could barely sleep the rest of the night. His restless mind and body tossed and turned for hours. He woke up in a cold sweat twice before. Sighing heavily, he put his robe back on. He went back to his room to wake Abby. She was sitting up, reading messages on her phone when he walked back into the room.
    “Good morning,” she said as she stretched.
    “Good morning, Abby.