Carried Forward By Hope by Ginny Dye Read Free Book Online Page A

and having the joy of getting to know my twin.” He smiled. “Rose is really something.”
    “That she is,” Moses agreed but continued to press. “Your life isn’t going to be the same, Jeremy. Are you ready for that?”
    Jeremy took another deep breath. “How can I be?” he asked simply. “I have no idea what it means. I’ve spent my entire life as a white person. I’ve worked in the Virginia government as a white man. I’ve earned respect as a white man. I’ve never experienced anything else…”
    “You have no idea what to expect,” Moses finished for him.
    “How could I?” Jeremy asked again, only his eyes revealing his tension. He looked at Moses for several long moments. “What can I expect?” he finally asked quietly.
    Moses opened his mouth, but then closed it again.
    “You started this conversation,” Jeremy reminded him. “You asked me if I’m ready. I think it only fair you give me some idea of what I need to be ready for .” He leaned forward. “You’re right that I need to know. I can’t think of anyone I would rather hear it from than you.”
    Moses frowned but knew he could be nothing but honest. “The fact that you’re a white man won’t matter once people find out you’re half black,” he said bluntly. “They will still be looking at blond hair and blue eyes, but they’ll see you differently.” He paused. “And they’ll use it to look down on you.”
    Jeremy nodded. “I experienced that because of my father’s work. There were people who looked at me differently because he chose to be the pastor of a black church.”
    “It will be different,” Moses said sadly. “Especially now…”
    “Now?”
    “Because the South lost the war. There are a lot of people who blame it on the slaves — on the black people. They figure if the North hadn’t come down here to set us free, then none of this would have happened.”
    “And if the South hadn’t made you slaves in the first place, none of this would have happened,” Jeremy responded evenly.
    Moses shook his head impatiently. “Reason doesn’t matter to way too many people. You’ll come to understand that. People are angry,” he said simply. “And when they’re angry they need someone or some thing to be angry at. We’re going to be it for a very long time.”
    He shifted John on his shoulder and looked down at his sleeping son. “It’s going to take a long time for things to change, and I’m afraid they’re going to get worse. My son is free, but he’s certainly not yet free to live his life. People want a target for their anger. Staying in the South is going to make us their target.”
    “What do you think will happen?” Jeremy asked.
    Moses shrugged. “Slavery meant white people had the right to do whatever they wanted to us. Control us…beat us…kill us…rape—”
    “Slavery is over,” Jeremy protested, his face tightening.
    “But hatred isn’t,” Moses said firmly, his eyes flashing with anger. John, sensing his temper, even in his sleep, stirred restlessly and whimpered. Moses took a deep breath and kept his voice calm. “Prejudice isn’t. The belief that we are less than them isn’t. I don’t believe the fact that we are no longer slaves is going to change those realities. It may actually make them worse.”
    “Worse?” Jeremy shook his head. “How?”
    “Worse,” Moses insisted. “It was bad enough when the South was successful and wealthy. Now they have lost everything. There is a lot of pain and a lot of anger.”
    “And people want a target for their pain,” Jeremy finished for him.
    “Yes,” Moses agreed, “but it goes even deeper than that. Slave owners truly believe blacks are an inferior species. They believe we are simply not capable of controlling our own destinies. It appalls them to think we are being put on equal footing with them. And it scares them,” he added. “They controlled us through slavery. Now suddenly we’re free. They’re going to be looking for