Casting Shadows by Sophie McKenzie Read Free Book Online

seconds, then Flynn started unbuttoning my top. ‘You look great in this,’ he said huskily.
    He started stroking his hands over my body. Wherever he touched it was like he was setting fire to me – all I could hear was our breathing – quick and uneven. After a while, he
stopped and took a condom out of his pocket.
    I held my breath.
    Of course, in the end, going all the way wasn’t the big deal I’d built it up to be. It certainly didn’t last as long as I’d expected. Afterwards, we held each other. My
mind raced in about twenty directions. It was done. I had done it. And I’d been totally wrong about it. About what it meant. I’d imagined it would give Flynn power over me. But the way
it was between the two of us, it was about each of us
giving up
power, about being vulnerable. Being close to each other.
    Flynn lifted his head and smiled. His eyes were soft, almost dreamy, as he kissed my nose. ‘That was amazing.’
    I smiled at him, and then this great swell of emotion surged up from my stomach. This was it. This was
it.
I couldn’t be closer to him than I was right now. I didn’t want
anything to change. Ever. My face crumpled and I burst into tears.
    Flynn stared at me in horror. ‘No. Oh God, River. I’m sorry. Oh God, I’m so, so sorry if that was rubbish for you. I promise I’ll make it better next—’
    ‘Sssh.’ I shook my head, pressing my hand against his mouth. ‘I’m crying ’cos I’m happy. ’Cos it was wonderful.’
    ‘Really?’ Flynn stared at me for a second.
    I nodded. Then I sniffed and wiped my face.
    Flynn hugged me again. I could almost feel the happiness coming off him in waves. ‘Was it really . . . okay?’ he said. He raised his eyebrows, trying to look all ironic and
sophisticated.
    I laughed. ‘You just want me to tell you it was wonderful again.’
    Flynn leaned over me. His eyes glinted in the dim light from the floor. He ran his hand down my side and leaned closer until his mouth was right over mine. I shivered, wanting him to kiss me so
much I couldn’t breathe. ‘It’ll be more wonderful next time,’ he murmured. ‘I promise.’

7
    I went home late the next morning in a daze. I’d switched my phone on as I walked away from James’s house, expecting there to be a million messages from Mum and
Dad. But there weren’t any. I pocketed the mobile and turned onto Crouch End Broadway, wondering what that was about. My head was still full of making love with Flynn – what we’d
done last night wasn’t so different from how we’d been together before, and yet it seemed to take us to a new level, to something bigger and stronger than we’d shared before.
    My house was only fifteen minutes’ walk away from James’s and it felt good to be strolling along in the sunshine. Above me, the sky was clear – it looked like today was going
to be another beautiful day. I sighed with contentment. And then I saw Emmi. She was walking towards me, her eyes focused on her phone. She glanced up. Saw me. A second later and we were right in
front of each other. We stopped walking. I gulped, feeling awkward.
    Up until Flynn’s return in March, Emmi had been my best friend. Smart, pretty and outrageously self-confident, she had taken me and Grace under her wing during our first term at Langton
Girls Grammar nearly six years ago. The three of us had been inseparable.
    ‘Hi, River.’ Emmi sounded guarded.
    Well, her tone wasn’t really surprising. The two of us hadn’t met up out of school for weeks. I was the one who’d withdrawn, but Emmi hadn’t helped. You see, at the start
of the year Emmi’s boyfriend Alex had accused Flynn of stealing his iPad. But I found out, back in March, that Alex had only pretended the iPad was missing in order to get his parents to
claim a better version on the insurance. For reasons which I couldn’t now remember, I’d promised never to tell Emmi that I knew.
    Like most of the other things I’d ever promised to keep quiet