Coming Undone by Staci Stallings Read Free Book Online

smile, knew it didn’t get that far, and hoped he wouldn’t completely break down right there in front of everybody.
    “ Um, we could go into my office,” Dr. Vitter said, and Ben nodded again, wanting no part of making that walk.
    “ Okay.”
     
     
    Ragged. That was a good word to describe Dr. Warren’s “family.” It wasn’t a family. Just one guy, and Kathryn wished she had thought to ask a few more questions. As they walked down the hall, Dr. Vitter in front, her in the middle, and the guy behind her, she sank into prayer because that was all she could think to do. God had better show up for this one because she was definitely out of her league. He looked just barely this side of death himself.
    In the office, Dr. Vitter motioned toward the little couch on the far wall, and Kathryn accepted his invitation. When she was seated, she watched Mr. Warren sit on the other side, gaze down, looking like he might fall off the earth if someone didn’t hold onto him. She smiled softly, hoping her compassion was evident and not condescending. It was then that she realized Dr. Vitter was not planning to stay.
    “ Take as long as you need,” he said, and with that, he turned and hustled out, closing the door behind him.
    Oh, help, God! her heart screamed into the abyss where she was now staring. She looked over at the guy who looked positively ripped to pieces. Where to start and how? Words failed her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t catch your first name.”
    When he looked up, his blue-green eyes were filled with a pleading for her to do something, anything someone hadn’t already thought of. “Uh, Ben. Ben Warren.”
    She nodded, wishing she could do or say something to take away the immense pain in his distraught eyes. “Mr. Warren…”
    “ Please, call me Ben,” he said with the saddest of smiles.
    “ Ben,” she said softly, “I’m sorry about what’s happened.” The words stopped because compassion choked the rest from her chest. She had learned not to force herself to keep talking in such situations. Time was a stabilizer that rushing simply couldn’t match. “Dr. Vitter said you’re considering hospice care for your father.”
    Ben’s dark eyebrows arched in slight sarcasm. “I guess.” He exhaled and put his elbows on his knees and his hands to his mouth. “I don’t really know what I’m doing to be honest with you. All of this… stuff is totally new to me. I don’t know what’s best. I don’t even know what’s worst at this point.”
    She watched him, her emotional radar searching for any and all signals that would guide her words. “I take it you will be the one to make the decision.”
    “ Yeah.” He laughed a hollow laugh. “Lucky me, huh?”
    Kathryn didn’t push it. He was working this out in his head and his heart, and she had to let him in his way, in his time.
    When he looked at her, there were a myriad of questions in his eyes. “Um, can I ask you some things? I mean, they didn’t really tell me much about your… program.”
    “ Certainly. Ask whatever you want.”
     
     
    Ben swallowed hard and let his gaze fall to the floor at his feet. It was brown. That registered. He was glad something did. Words were becoming harder and harder to come by and harder to say without breaking down completely. “Um, well, I take it from what Dr. Vitter said that once Dad is transferred… there, that’s pretty much it. Right? I mean he won’t get any care after that.”
    “ If you mean do we put him in a dark room and wait for the end, no that’s not what we do.” Her voice was soft and very kind. “We feel we’re a place that can provide the needed transition time for your father and for the family. Hospitals are wonderful for those who are going to survive, but they are not great places to die.”
    Die. Man, he hated that word, but he nodded anyway even though his gaze was still firmly on the floor.
    “ The staff and machines and keeping the family at bay are just not conducive