Cowboys for Christmas by Jan Springer Read Free Book Online

back to work, I started to have panic attacks. I had to go on medical leave. Did a lot of research on the subject and did some post-traumatic stress disorder counseling and learned to change my way of thinking. Cognitive therapy, they call it. It’s not a magic wand that cures you at once. It takes time to change the way you think and react to things. But cognitive therapy was well worth my efforts. I also did exposure therapy.”
    “Exposure therapy?” She hadn’t heard of that.
    “While changing your way of thinking, you are also exposing yourself to whatever it is that frightens you and causes you to panic. In your case, I would say, planes and enclosed spaces?”
    Shit. Exposing herself to plane rides was the last thing she wanted to do. And yet, Blue’s description of freedom sounded exactly what she was searching for.
    To be able to go up into the sky and go anywhere she wanted would be the ultimate in freedom.
    But JJ would never leave her cowboys. She loved them and her life here too much. Yet, to soar, to conquer her fears, even for a few hours at a time would be heaven.
    Yet terrifying, too. No, she couldn’t do something like exposure therapy. Could she?
    “You must want to leave here sometime. I mean to be able to go to a city and get some heavy-duty clothes shopping in, or go out to dinner with the guys so you don’t have to cook all the time.
    Have them buy you supper at some fancy restaurant and stay at a scrumptious hotel…”
    JJ was about to protest and let Blue know she was perfectly content not going to restaurants or hotels, and didn’t mind shopping online for clothes, despite the fact that she rarely was able to get something that fit her perfectly without trying it on, when she realized why Blue had stopped talking and was gazing at the open barn door.
    The grumble of approaching all terrain vehicles brought such a mixture of emotions roaring through JJ that she stood stock-still as a blanket of dark fear whirled through her.
    Would all three of them be returning? Were only two of them back? Did they have good news?
    Or was their news going to change her life forever?
    “Come on, let’s go see,” Blue prodded. Yet JJ hesitated. Blue must have sensed JJ’s whirlwind of emotions for she reached out and grabbed JJ’s hand and squeezed with a gentle reassurance.
    “Whatever it is, we can handle it,” Blue said with a quiet confidence that made JJ envy the woman. Yes, she wanted to be confident like Blue. Wanted to be able to handle everything.
    JJ blew out a tense breath and nodded.
    “Let’s go,” JJ said.

Chapter Four
    JJ had left the outside lights on to both the ranch and the barn when they’d come out here and when Blue and herself emerged from the barn, the yard and surrounding buildings were illuminated.
    Immense relief splashed through her when she spied Brady on one of the vehicles and Rafe with Dan behind him, on the second.
    Thank God! They had found Dan! They were all safe!
    Happiness almost smothered her, when, a few seconds later, all three men descended the vehicles and lifted off their helmets.
    JJ couldn’t run fast enough to them. She wrapped her arms around Dan and squeezed him tight.
    Having his hard, warm body pressed against hers brought a rush of love that almost
    overwhelmed her. Brady and Rafe embraced both Dan and herself and that was the instant she realized she was seriously and hopelessly in love with all three of her cowboys. Suddenly she didn’t care if Blue was watching. She kissed Dan full on the mouth to welcome him home but heard his sharp inhalation of breath.
    He was hurt.
    Concern and despair slammed into her. Quickly she pulled away and examined him.
    Immediately she spotted a dark bruise and a gash across his forehead.
    “What happened?” she asked as she grabbed Dan’s hand and led him toward the ranch house.
    Dan was unsteady on his feet and JJ’s concern for him skyrocketed. She wrapped her arm around his waist instructing him to lean