Designated Fat Girl by Jennifer Joyner Read Free Book Online Page B

I would make it back onto TV. I also wasn’t getting any younger, and I started to worry that if I didn’t do something soon, I was going to lose my window of eligibility. There’s no written rule that older women can’t be television reporters, just as there is nothing in writing that says overweight women can’t be on TV. But I think it’s safe to say the deck is definitely stacked against heavier and/or older females.
    Then I saw an opportunity to get back into TV—not as an on-air reporter, but with a station I greatly loved and admired.It was an entry-level position at the Fayetteville bureau of WRAL-TV, the CBS affiliate out of Raleigh/Durham, where Michael had worked as a news photographer for the last several years. I knew I could go in and wow them with my skills. I figured once I lost the weight they would gladly put me on the air. I know this all sounds so unrealistic, but to me, it was quite real and within my grasp. My afternoon job would be in Michael’s office, supporting the stories that he and his reporter were working on. I would be doing double duty, because I still worked at the radio station early in the morning. My schedule would be packed, but I figured that was a good thing; no time to eat, right? Right.
    Being back in television felt like home. News was my primary focus, and it was where I felt my strengths were. And I worked for an awesome station, with some of the best reporters in the business. I learned so much about news gathering and ethics and journalism, there was no doubt this was my passion. I gave up the radio job so that I could work full-time as an assignment editor at the main station in Raleigh. It was a two-hour commute every day, but I loved it, and I honestly felt it was a means to an end. I still, even after all of that time, felt I would lose the weight and make it on the air. I was already impressing everyone with my work; once I got my appearance in order, I would be well on my way.
    The job was wonderful, but it was very stressful. I was in charge of the assignment desk, which is the nucleus of the television newsroom. I helped decide what stories we were going to cover and how we would cover them; I reacted to breaking news with our many resources, including satellite trucks and ahelicopter. I had to manage a staff of reporters and photographers and find content for multiple newscasts a day plus our 24/7 news Web site. It was a busy, busy time. I should have lost weight with no problem. But again I used the stress and the commute to my disadvantage, turning to food to calm me down and pass the time riding home. Every day I sent reporters out on stories that I knew I could cover well, that I could tell in a meaningful way. But I just couldn’t seem to make it happen. I was beginning to finally face reality: My dream of returning to on-air reporting was starting to slip away.
    And then something really strange happened. Our television station also had an FM radio station that played adult contemporary music and had a locally produced morning show. The news was provided by anchors at the television station, which was a hard thing to manage. Those anchors had speaking engagements and other responsibilities, so making it in to do radio in the morning was difficult. Word got around that I had worked in radio for years, and I was asked if I wanted to fill in. I would be paid overtime, which was excellent money, plus I would be able to return to on-air reporting. I was thrilled! I filled in several times and was complimented by many people. The extra money was terrific, and it was exciting to be back on the air.
    All of a sudden, though, there was a problem. When I did these newscasts, they were live, from a booth at the television station. I wore headphones, and I plugged in and waited for my cue, much like I had done for years at the oldies station in Fayetteville. But then one day I found myself really, really nervous. This perplexed me. I had done this so many times before,